1 00:03:31,080 --> 00:03:33,370 Oh, shut up, you putz. 2 00:03:48,633 --> 00:03:52,113 Hi, dad. I just want you to know why I'm being so silent lately. 3 00:03:52,137 --> 00:03:56,618 It's nothing personal, but I feel it's very hard to express myself in words. 4 00:03:56,642 --> 00:04:00,932 Here's a tape which expresses my state of mind right now. 5 00:04:40,492 --> 00:04:43,953 My son, the filmmaker. 6 00:04:47,768 --> 00:04:51,088 I gotta call the sprinkler man now. Jeez. 7 00:05:09,225 --> 00:05:11,785 Ah, there we are. 8 00:05:18,635 --> 00:05:20,949 Mr. Whiteman, what a nice new home suit. 9 00:05:20,973 --> 00:05:22,951 Carmen, limpie las... 10 00:05:22,975 --> 00:05:24,953 how do you say "candelabras"? Candelabras. 11 00:05:24,977 --> 00:05:29,057 Barbara, she speaks English. I know that but, the next time we go to Mexico, 12 00:05:29,081 --> 00:05:32,528 I intend to be prepared for any emergencia. Emergencia. 13 00:05:32,552 --> 00:05:35,297 Where's Jenny? Emergencia. She's asleep. 14 00:05:35,321 --> 00:05:37,500 Vaya Al marcardo... Mercado. 15 00:05:37,524 --> 00:05:42,039 Family, scene one, take one. Preparing the feast, my father, Dave Whiteman. 16 00:05:42,063 --> 00:05:45,309 - Get out, Max. - How do you think Steven Spielberg got started? 17 00:05:45,333 --> 00:05:49,514 - How do you feel this Thanksgiving? - I'll tell you how I feel. 18 00:05:49,538 --> 00:05:52,050 I feel like my son should stop acting ridiculous... 19 00:05:52,074 --> 00:05:54,920 On this day when we should all be giving thanks. 20 00:05:54,944 --> 00:05:58,725 - And guilty. - Yeah, we should all be feeling a little guilty. 21 00:05:58,749 --> 00:06:01,661 - People are starving in the world. - Guilt is useless. 22 00:06:01,685 --> 00:06:04,396 Your swami tell you that? My yogi, Ranbir. 23 00:06:06,124 --> 00:06:09,504 Isn't this a holiday? It's the caterer with the Turkey. 24 00:06:09,528 --> 00:06:12,039 Arrival of the bird. Carmen, la porta, por favor. 25 00:06:12,063 --> 00:06:14,624 Why doesn't he use the servants' entrance? 26 00:06:17,137 --> 00:06:19,582 ¿por quã no USA la Puerta de atrã¡s? Let's go. 27 00:06:19,606 --> 00:06:23,219 Ah, the sister, the Princess, back home from Sarah Lawrence. 28 00:06:23,243 --> 00:06:25,889 Morning. I'm going to the beach. If Stacey calls, 29 00:06:25,913 --> 00:06:27,858 tell her that I left already. 30 00:06:27,882 --> 00:06:32,763 - No breakfast? - I'll get something down there. Bye, dad. 31 00:06:32,787 --> 00:06:34,907 Bye, Max. 32 00:06:37,961 --> 00:06:42,575 All I do is wave to her. She's nothing but a blur with a nice smell. 33 00:06:42,599 --> 00:06:46,779 Al, Al, is the bird big enough? My father loves white meat. 34 00:06:46,803 --> 00:06:50,951 Your bird's bigger than Mel Brooks' bird, and he's got 15 people coming, Mr. W. 35 00:06:50,975 --> 00:06:54,826 - Is he nice, Mel Brooks? - Very sweet man. 36 00:06:56,815 --> 00:07:00,736 Get the door. Come on, get the door. Let's go. 37 00:07:05,124 --> 00:07:08,974 Come on, Kerouac, let Jerry sleep. 38 00:07:19,674 --> 00:07:23,522 Hello. You look hungry, huh? 39 00:07:23,546 --> 00:07:28,106 Yeah, you want what I've got here? Yeah, isn't that good? 40 00:07:35,793 --> 00:07:39,773 Hey. Hey, are you lost? 41 00:07:39,797 --> 00:07:42,677 You don't have a collar on, huh? 42 00:07:42,701 --> 00:07:45,980 Yeah, you wanna come home with me? 43 00:07:46,004 --> 00:07:48,994 My husband's gonna kill me. Come on. Come on. 44 00:07:56,584 --> 00:08:00,831 Yeah, come on. That's right. 45 00:08:00,855 --> 00:08:05,069 Let me show you something. This is our mobile home park. 46 00:08:05,093 --> 00:08:09,073 We're talking about 500 units. Jenny, you want some more meat? 47 00:08:09,097 --> 00:08:11,043 I ate at the beach, daddy. 48 00:08:11,067 --> 00:08:14,513 What kind of people live in those trailer parks? 49 00:08:14,537 --> 00:08:17,150 We got nice retired people like Mel and Sadie... 50 00:08:17,174 --> 00:08:20,554 And people who are sick and tired of the rat race. 51 00:08:20,578 --> 00:08:24,658 Maybe I should move into one of my parks. Could you hold the photo up? 52 00:08:24,682 --> 00:08:28,829 Stop it, Max. You can walk on the fire, on the coals, no question. 53 00:08:28,853 --> 00:08:32,267 Yogi, can you teach my daughter to eat? 54 00:08:32,291 --> 00:08:35,771 That's a deeply neurotic statement, dad, really. 55 00:08:35,795 --> 00:08:38,040 Carmen, las Cranberries, por favor. 56 00:08:38,064 --> 00:08:41,578 There's no more white meat. I told you I love white meat. 57 00:08:41,602 --> 00:08:43,546 The pooch ate the white meat. 58 00:08:43,570 --> 00:08:45,948 Barbara, next year I'm using another caterer. 59 00:08:45,972 --> 00:08:47,584 Make sure you give me the receipts. 60 00:08:47,608 --> 00:08:52,891 Sidney, I would like to try and walk on hot coals. Is that a tax deduction, yogi? 61 00:08:52,915 --> 00:08:57,929 Yes. It is? Then walk on hot coals; I don't care. 62 00:08:57,953 --> 00:09:02,568 How's your family, Carmen? Not so very good, senora Waltzburg. 63 00:09:02,592 --> 00:09:05,805 My brother, he's trying to come up here to find a job. 64 00:09:05,829 --> 00:09:09,309 - What does he do? - He cuts sugar cane in the fields. 65 00:09:09,333 --> 00:09:12,384 Not much call for that in Los Angeles. 66 00:09:16,007 --> 00:09:18,820 Who asked you? 67 00:09:18,844 --> 00:09:21,790 - Matisse, stop that. - Neurotic dog scene, take one. 68 00:09:21,814 --> 00:09:25,794 - You're the one that's neurotic. - We're taking him to a dog psychiatrist. 69 00:09:25,818 --> 00:09:30,099 Father and son scene, take one. Max, I think it's about time... 70 00:09:30,123 --> 00:09:34,571 That you started learning the hanger business, stop wasting time with the camera. 71 00:09:34,595 --> 00:09:37,241 - I don't like hangers. - You don't like hangers? 72 00:09:37,265 --> 00:09:39,644 It's hangers that clothe and feed you! 73 00:09:39,668 --> 00:09:44,616 It's hangers that pay for the fakakta camera, for cryin' out loud. 74 00:09:44,640 --> 00:09:47,920 Max, talk to me man to man. 75 00:09:47,944 --> 00:09:50,122 What's troubling you? What is it? 76 00:09:50,146 --> 00:09:53,836 Perhaps we should all meditate for a moment. 77 00:10:13,840 --> 00:10:16,000 Kerouac? 78 00:10:18,312 --> 00:10:20,392 Kerouac? 79 00:10:27,757 --> 00:10:29,877 Kerouac! 80 00:10:41,773 --> 00:10:44,323 Did you see a little tan dog? 81 00:10:47,946 --> 00:10:50,827 Kerouac. 82 00:10:51,851 --> 00:10:54,731 Kerouac! 83 00:11:50,784 --> 00:11:55,298 Anybody seen my dog? It's a little tan dog. I lost my little dog. 84 00:11:55,322 --> 00:11:57,836 No! No. No! 85 00:11:57,860 --> 00:12:00,310 I lost my little tan dog. 86 00:12:01,864 --> 00:12:05,610 Kerouac! Has somebody got him? 87 00:12:05,634 --> 00:12:07,579 Excuse me. Who's got my dog? 88 00:12:07,603 --> 00:12:11,283 Excuse me, you're gonna have to leave. No! I lost my goddamn dog. 89 00:12:11,307 --> 00:12:13,920 You're gonna have to leave the restaurant. 90 00:12:13,944 --> 00:12:16,134 Security is... Kerouac! 91 00:12:25,991 --> 00:12:27,969 Well, well, well. 92 00:12:27,993 --> 00:12:30,840 What's the problem, Jerry? I lost my dog. I'm lookin' for my dog. 93 00:12:30,864 --> 00:12:32,875 He lost his dog. Yeah, that's right. 94 00:12:32,899 --> 00:12:36,012 I think you ought to stop runnin' around here harassing people. 95 00:12:36,036 --> 00:12:40,217 My dog was stolen. I think it was dognapping. I understand. 96 00:12:40,241 --> 00:12:44,288 Why don't you go downtown and take a bath? Screw you. I'm a citizen. 97 00:12:44,312 --> 00:12:46,290 Just relax now. I understand. Come on. 98 00:12:46,314 --> 00:12:49,034 I'm a citizen. Okay. Okay. 99 00:13:02,266 --> 00:13:06,180 - I wish you could stay a little longer. - I'll be back at Christmas. 100 00:13:06,204 --> 00:13:08,215 Maybe Jim will come home with me. 101 00:13:08,239 --> 00:13:12,686 Yeah, I'd like to meet him. It seems real serious. 102 00:13:12,710 --> 00:13:16,062 It's hard to find someone as nice as you, dad. 103 00:13:17,884 --> 00:13:20,362 What does he do, this Jim guy? 104 00:13:20,386 --> 00:13:25,168 He's road manager for a rock group. Hope he's not a drug addict. 105 00:13:25,192 --> 00:13:28,105 He smokes some grass and does a little cocaine, 106 00:13:28,129 --> 00:13:30,707 but I assure you he's perfectly normal. 107 00:13:30,731 --> 00:13:35,580 I want you to tell me that you don't do drugs. Dad, stop this inquisition. 108 00:13:35,604 --> 00:13:39,584 I'm 19 years old. Okay, okay. I'm your father. 109 00:13:39,608 --> 00:13:43,956 Why does mother keep falling for all these gurus and charlatans? 110 00:13:43,980 --> 00:13:46,927 It's so '60s. 111 00:13:46,951 --> 00:13:49,229 Hey, hey, hey. What? 112 00:13:49,253 --> 00:13:53,374 You haven't said anything about the car. It's nice. 113 00:13:54,825 --> 00:13:57,705 Nice. 114 00:13:57,729 --> 00:14:01,076 It's not too, uh, too Beverly Hills? 115 00:14:01,100 --> 00:14:06,048 Dad, you do not have to justify anything. You work very, very hard for your money. 116 00:14:06,072 --> 00:14:10,820 Well, I guess I feel, you know, a little guilty. Guilt sucks. 117 00:14:10,844 --> 00:14:13,234 Yeah. Kiss. Bye. 118 00:14:16,750 --> 00:14:20,141 Maybe they'll give her a good meal on the plane. 119 00:15:03,638 --> 00:15:06,117 I'm very worried about Jenny. Why? 120 00:15:06,141 --> 00:15:10,322 I think she's an anorexic. Anybody who doesn't snack all day is anorexic to you. 121 00:15:10,346 --> 00:15:12,690 Couldn't she go to school in California? 122 00:15:12,714 --> 00:15:15,961 There are very good schools in California. She just wanted a change. 123 00:15:15,985 --> 00:15:19,032 Who's this Jim guy? I'm sure he's very nice. 124 00:15:19,056 --> 00:15:23,476 Think they're having sex already? Dave, don't get yourself upset. 125 00:15:25,228 --> 00:15:28,309 What does that mean? What does that mean? 126 00:15:28,333 --> 00:15:33,893 It's a new age for women, honey. Barbara... Barbara. 127 00:15:35,240 --> 00:15:39,255 Do you know more than you're saying? I hope she is having sex. 128 00:15:39,279 --> 00:15:41,429 It's time. 129 00:15:44,184 --> 00:15:47,030 You've got great shoulders, Barb. Must be the moon. 130 00:15:47,054 --> 00:15:50,734 Come on, I'm feeling very sexy. Who cares what the reason is. 131 00:15:50,758 --> 00:15:52,903 I'm very depressed. Come on. 132 00:15:52,927 --> 00:15:57,708 Come on, my little baby. It's too much meditating. Oh, no. Honey... 133 00:15:57,732 --> 00:16:01,946 I think it's an allergy. In fact, I'm convinced of it. So is Ranbir. 134 00:16:01,970 --> 00:16:06,231 Honey, please. Maybe you're allergic to me. 135 00:16:07,277 --> 00:16:10,391 Dave, you're such a nudge. 136 00:16:10,415 --> 00:16:12,735 Barbara. 137 00:16:13,918 --> 00:16:16,068 You happy? 138 00:16:19,257 --> 00:16:22,749 I'm content. Sometimes I wonder. 139 00:16:23,163 --> 00:16:25,108 Dave, I'm changing. 140 00:16:25,132 --> 00:16:28,277 That causes stress. You should take a couple of Tylenol. 141 00:16:28,301 --> 00:16:31,922 I'm not even going to dignify that with a response. 142 00:16:35,909 --> 00:16:39,729 I'm very worried about Max. He seems very confused. 143 00:16:41,182 --> 00:16:43,904 I saw him in a tutu tonight. 144 00:16:47,757 --> 00:16:50,247 Dave? 145 00:16:51,327 --> 00:16:55,842 Dave, that was the cherry on the cake of my day. 146 00:16:55,866 --> 00:16:58,645 Thank you. 147 00:16:58,669 --> 00:17:00,950 Good night, honey. Good night, Barb. 148 00:17:06,879 --> 00:17:11,025 Dog's supposed to be loyal, goddamn it. Where the hell's your loyalty? 149 00:17:11,049 --> 00:17:15,597 You're a mutt. You're an ungrateful mutt of a mongrel, that's what you are. 150 00:17:15,621 --> 00:17:19,370 You son-of-a-bitch. You wait 'til I get my hands on ya. 151 00:17:19,394 --> 00:17:21,638 Son-of-a... 152 00:17:21,662 --> 00:17:23,822 Kerouac? 153 00:17:39,350 --> 00:17:41,730 Go for it, putz. 154 00:17:58,838 --> 00:18:01,219 Oh, Mr. Whiteman. Oh. 155 00:18:04,778 --> 00:18:07,838 You have to call me Dave. Oh, Dave. 156 00:18:09,850 --> 00:18:12,061 Oh, I knew you would come tonight. 157 00:18:21,364 --> 00:18:23,445 Oh, Mr. Whiteman. 158 00:18:25,302 --> 00:18:28,248 Shut up, you putz you. 159 00:18:28,272 --> 00:18:32,792 I hate that dog so much. 160 00:18:36,815 --> 00:18:39,235 Oh, trouble at the Whiteman house. 161 00:18:47,260 --> 00:18:51,640 Goddamn alarm. Cops are gonna come. Oh, I have no green card. 162 00:18:51,664 --> 00:18:54,255 I'll take care of this pronto. 163 00:19:09,852 --> 00:19:12,264 Close encounters of the fourth kind, take one. 164 00:19:12,288 --> 00:19:16,769 My house! My house! My house! No problem. 165 00:19:16,793 --> 00:19:21,074 It's okay. No robbery. Don't worry. It's okay. There's no robbery. 166 00:19:21,098 --> 00:19:24,111 We'll take a look around anyway. You never know. Fine. No problem. 167 00:19:24,135 --> 00:19:27,348 Sorry, Mr. Whiteman. Lance, why do these things keep happening? 168 00:19:27,372 --> 00:19:30,184 Could be a change in humidity, or some animal. 169 00:19:30,208 --> 00:19:33,789 I'm going to need an alarm for the alarm. Get your hands off them guns! 170 00:19:33,813 --> 00:19:37,259 I'm Orvis Goodnight! 171 00:19:37,283 --> 00:19:39,930 A record producer, you understand? 172 00:19:39,954 --> 00:19:44,267 I live right across the street from this place, but I don't get... 173 00:19:44,291 --> 00:19:46,637 This kind of service, no, sir. 174 00:19:46,661 --> 00:19:49,873 Two weeks ago, a thief tried to break in my house. 175 00:19:49,897 --> 00:19:52,778 Called the police. Good god almighty. 176 00:19:52,802 --> 00:19:56,649 It took 20 minutes for the policemen to arrive. 177 00:19:56,673 --> 00:20:01,688 One little car. No dog. No chopper. 178 00:20:01,712 --> 00:20:05,158 I know why I don't get the protection I'm supposed to get. 179 00:20:05,182 --> 00:20:08,895 Because I'm black. Black! I'm a black man! 180 00:20:08,919 --> 00:20:12,066 Ain't no black man supposed to live in Beverly Hills. 181 00:20:12,090 --> 00:20:15,170 Let one black man stop to tie his shoes... 182 00:20:15,194 --> 00:20:18,039 Or scratch his behind on rodeo drive; 183 00:20:18,063 --> 00:20:23,144 the SWAT team would parachute down over my brothers. 184 00:20:23,168 --> 00:20:26,182 I spent $3.6 million... 185 00:20:26,206 --> 00:20:29,887 For that pile of stucco you see over there. 186 00:20:29,911 --> 00:20:33,323 I want the same protection, the same protection, 187 00:20:33,347 --> 00:20:36,060 that you give old David Whiteman over there. 188 00:20:36,084 --> 00:20:38,663 And I'm bringin' in mo' brothers. 189 00:20:38,687 --> 00:20:41,037 Mo' brothers! Whoo-woo! 190 00:20:43,358 --> 00:20:45,905 I'm gonna sue you, Whiteman. Matisse! 191 00:20:45,929 --> 00:20:48,609 Matisse! This dog is a killer dog. He's gonna kill somebody. 192 00:20:48,633 --> 00:20:52,345 Max, stop it. Come in, please. All right, thank you very much. 193 00:20:52,369 --> 00:20:57,351 Sorry, Mr. Whiteman. Take care of it as soon as you can. All right, all right. 194 00:20:57,375 --> 00:21:00,255 Get that helicopter out of here, please! 195 00:21:16,096 --> 00:21:19,076 Kerouac? 196 00:21:19,100 --> 00:21:21,250 Kerouac? 197 00:22:46,700 --> 00:22:48,812 Bueno, Jesus. 198 00:22:48,836 --> 00:22:51,314 No. No, no. Muy bueno, Jesus. 199 00:22:51,338 --> 00:22:56,153 I'll come down in a couple of days so that I can wish all the hombres... 200 00:22:56,177 --> 00:22:59,057 Barbara, how do you say "happy new year" in Spanish? Feliz aã±o. 201 00:22:59,081 --> 00:23:01,232 Feliz aã±os, okay? 202 00:23:34,287 --> 00:23:38,936 Just me and my, uh, esposa... 203 00:23:38,960 --> 00:23:42,911 hold on, hold on. Barbara, is that the new pool man? 204 00:23:48,838 --> 00:23:51,118 Hey. Hey! 205 00:23:56,279 --> 00:23:59,092 Call 911! Call 911! 206 00:23:59,116 --> 00:24:01,806 Call 911! Call 911! 207 00:24:02,453 --> 00:24:05,944 Call 911! Call 911! 208 00:24:10,262 --> 00:24:13,282 Call 911! Call 911! 209 00:24:25,980 --> 00:24:28,459 Call 911! Oh, my god! 210 00:24:28,483 --> 00:24:31,663 Oh, my god! Oh, Mr. Whiteman! What's happening? 211 00:24:31,687 --> 00:24:34,867 Oh, my god. 212 00:24:41,031 --> 00:24:43,309 Down here, Dave. Come here! 213 00:24:43,333 --> 00:24:47,113 I ay, dios mã­o! 214 00:24:47,137 --> 00:24:51,218 Over here, Dave. I got him. Come here, come here. 215 00:24:51,242 --> 00:24:54,189 I got him, I got him. Oh, my god. 216 00:24:54,213 --> 00:24:57,192 Hold him! He's got rocks in his pockets. 217 00:24:57,216 --> 00:24:59,662 Hello? Operadora. Operadora! 218 00:24:59,686 --> 00:25:02,198 Oh, my god. I called 911. 219 00:25:02,222 --> 00:25:06,312 [ Shouting ] 220 00:25:08,161 --> 00:25:11,082 What the hell? C.P.R. C.P.R. 221 00:25:12,199 --> 00:25:15,246 Don't, Dave. You'll catch aids or plague or herpes! 222 00:25:15,270 --> 00:25:18,160 Oh, my god! 223 00:25:29,118 --> 00:25:31,832 He lives. He lives! 224 00:25:31,856 --> 00:25:34,668 Carmen, get some blankets. Get some Brandy, quick. 225 00:25:34,692 --> 00:25:37,238 Quick! Quick! Get him over to the chaise lounge. 226 00:25:37,262 --> 00:25:39,841 Come on, get him over. There we go. 227 00:25:39,865 --> 00:25:42,885 All right, hold him. There we go. 228 00:25:44,871 --> 00:25:47,561 The dog killed somebody. I told you. 229 00:25:51,912 --> 00:25:54,302 Okay, here. Drink this, drink this. 230 00:25:57,318 --> 00:26:01,131 Ugh. Christ, you got any Courvoisier? He must be in shock. 231 00:26:01,155 --> 00:26:05,703 How long was he in the water? Not very long. I gave him c.P.R. 232 00:26:05,727 --> 00:26:09,708 He saved him. Would you check my husband? He had his lips on this man's lips. 233 00:26:09,732 --> 00:26:12,278 Good work. Thank you. You feeling any better? 234 00:26:12,302 --> 00:26:14,914 What gives, amigo? You almost drowned. 235 00:26:14,938 --> 00:26:17,951 I know that. Nobody drowns in my backyard. 236 00:26:17,975 --> 00:26:20,821 If I'd have known that, I'd have gone somewhere else. 237 00:26:20,845 --> 00:26:23,723 How did he get in? I didn't hear the alarm. I don't know. 238 00:26:23,747 --> 00:26:26,159 I'm going to check the water for bacteria. 239 00:26:26,183 --> 00:26:31,133 I knew that lifesaving class would come in handy. I knew it. Look at that. 240 00:26:31,157 --> 00:26:35,304 He's drunk and disgusting. He's a human being. Where's your sense of charity? 241 00:26:35,328 --> 00:26:38,741 I volunteer three days a week at the free clinic. 242 00:26:38,765 --> 00:26:43,413 I am shocked at you, Barbara. There but for the grace of god go you or I. 243 00:26:43,437 --> 00:26:47,985 No, dear, not me. I would never sink so low. I'd kill myself first. 244 00:26:48,009 --> 00:26:50,956 I have aerobics in 50 minutes. 245 00:26:50,980 --> 00:26:52,991 I have lunch at Neiman-Marcus. Go. Who's stopping you? 246 00:26:53,015 --> 00:26:55,125 Go right ahead. 247 00:26:57,386 --> 00:27:01,100 - Are you sure you're all right? - I'm fine. 248 00:27:01,124 --> 00:27:03,484 You are a hero, you know. 249 00:27:06,029 --> 00:27:11,011 I'm just a scaredy-cat. Maybe the police could take him to the rescue mission. 250 00:27:11,035 --> 00:27:13,826 It's okay. Go to lunch. Thanks. 251 00:27:23,083 --> 00:27:26,997 Why don't you leave him with me? I'll take care of him. 252 00:27:27,021 --> 00:27:29,471 Okay. All right. Thanks a lot. 253 00:27:30,324 --> 00:27:32,474 See ya. 254 00:27:37,832 --> 00:27:40,979 Shut up. Shut up, you putz! 255 00:27:41,003 --> 00:27:43,153 You think you can get up? 256 00:27:44,340 --> 00:27:46,252 Yeah. Okay, Carmen, give me a hand. 257 00:27:46,276 --> 00:27:48,688 Matisse, get down, you rotten... come on. 258 00:27:48,712 --> 00:27:50,723 There we go. That's it. 259 00:27:50,747 --> 00:27:54,997 So, what's your name? Esther Williams. 260 00:27:56,888 --> 00:27:59,038 My name's Dave Whiteman. 261 00:28:00,358 --> 00:28:04,172 Jerry M. Baskin. What does the "M" stand for? 262 00:28:04,196 --> 00:28:06,341 This your place? Yeah, yeah. 263 00:28:06,365 --> 00:28:09,245 What, are you a gangster? No, I make hangers. 264 00:28:09,269 --> 00:28:12,348 Here, put this on. Carmen, give me a hand. 265 00:28:12,372 --> 00:28:15,084 Why don't you take these wet things off? 266 00:28:15,108 --> 00:28:18,022 I don't like this. You got a Terry cloth? 267 00:28:18,046 --> 00:28:20,357 That is a brand-new robe. 268 00:28:20,381 --> 00:28:24,432 Brooks brothers. I used to shop there. 269 00:28:26,421 --> 00:28:30,972 Carmen, take some of these wet things into the washer, okay? Dave. 270 00:28:33,429 --> 00:28:34,974 Don't throw that stuff out. Mr. Whiteman! 271 00:28:34,998 --> 00:28:39,588 Carmen, oigame, por favor. Please, in the washer. Come on. 272 00:28:42,474 --> 00:28:44,594 Help him, uh... 273 00:28:48,746 --> 00:28:53,328 I ay, dios mã­o! 274 00:28:53,352 --> 00:28:56,098 You want me to help you out? Okay. All right, then. 275 00:28:56,122 --> 00:28:58,133 Yeah. Whoa, whoa! 276 00:28:58,157 --> 00:29:00,270 Get a grip on there. 277 00:29:00,294 --> 00:29:03,740 Ah! Carmen? 278 00:29:03,764 --> 00:29:06,843 Give me the robe. Yeah, yeah. 279 00:29:06,867 --> 00:29:10,517 Thank you. Yeah. Carmen? Carmen, Carmen. 280 00:29:25,456 --> 00:29:28,835 Want somethin' to eat? What you got? 281 00:29:28,859 --> 00:29:33,707 Uh, Turkey. You know, all the stuff that's left over from Thanksgiving. 282 00:29:33,731 --> 00:29:38,214 Got any white meat? 283 00:29:38,238 --> 00:29:40,828 Caterer really stinks, you know? 284 00:29:43,143 --> 00:29:45,221 Who made this dressing? My mother. 285 00:29:45,245 --> 00:29:49,126 Too much onion. You could at least say thank you. 286 00:29:49,150 --> 00:29:52,729 For what? For the food. 287 00:29:52,753 --> 00:29:56,166 Thanks. For, for, for saving your life. 288 00:29:56,190 --> 00:29:58,170 Are my clothes dry? Soon. 289 00:29:58,194 --> 00:30:02,514 You can keep the robe. You might ask me to thank you again. 290 00:30:05,534 --> 00:30:07,412 You're pretty tough, huh? Can I ask you a question, Jerry? 291 00:30:07,436 --> 00:30:11,587 How did you get... I don't want to use the word "low," but... 292 00:30:13,377 --> 00:30:18,259 What happened to you? I mean, you're obviously a very intelligent guy. 293 00:30:18,283 --> 00:30:21,996 I was pretty active politically in the '60s. Sold some draft cards. 294 00:30:22,020 --> 00:30:24,699 They nailed me for counterfeit government documents. 295 00:30:24,723 --> 00:30:27,735 They give me 45 years and a $75,000 fine. 296 00:30:27,759 --> 00:30:31,006 Suspended it; Put me under the youth correction act. 297 00:30:31,030 --> 00:30:34,277 I was a felon. So fuck it, I got into acting. 298 00:30:34,301 --> 00:30:37,122 Show business. Huh. 299 00:30:38,206 --> 00:30:42,927 There was this girl in the class. She split. 300 00:30:44,079 --> 00:30:48,926 She was beautiful. She was one in a million. 301 00:30:48,950 --> 00:30:51,196 You've seen her. Who? 302 00:30:51,220 --> 00:30:54,401 - Linda Evans. - TV Linda Evans? 303 00:30:54,425 --> 00:30:57,137 "Dynasty"? No, it was before "Dynasty." 304 00:30:57,161 --> 00:31:00,740 Can I get some more cranberry sauce? No, I'll get it. 305 00:31:00,764 --> 00:31:03,877 It was between "The Big Valley" and "Dynasty." You know, that period. 306 00:31:03,901 --> 00:31:07,281 Anyway, we broke up. Carmen? 307 00:31:07,305 --> 00:31:10,918 I was in bad shape for about a year. 308 00:31:10,942 --> 00:31:14,890 But that didn't do it, really. I used to drink a lot. 309 00:31:14,914 --> 00:31:17,727 I did a lot of drugs. Thank you. 310 00:31:17,751 --> 00:31:22,265 Then my sister, my little sister, died of leukemia. 311 00:31:22,289 --> 00:31:25,836 We were real close because we were orphans so young together. 312 00:31:25,860 --> 00:31:28,010 That's what did it. 313 00:31:29,264 --> 00:31:32,475 So I lost, uh, I lost my, uh... 314 00:31:35,036 --> 00:31:38,251 ...incentive, so I didn't care about myself, 315 00:31:38,275 --> 00:31:41,935 so I learned to survive on the street, you know? 316 00:31:49,052 --> 00:31:52,267 - Sorry. - Yeah, yeah. I gotta go. 317 00:31:52,291 --> 00:31:57,181 Where you gonna go? I don't know. ¿quiã©n sabe? 318 00:32:03,803 --> 00:32:06,782 Hey. Hey, hey, Jerry. You're not gonna pull... 319 00:32:06,806 --> 00:32:09,987 That swimming pool stunt again, are you? 320 00:32:10,011 --> 00:32:13,457 Mind if I take one of these grapefruit? Don't want scurvy. 321 00:32:13,481 --> 00:32:15,631 No, no, no. Go ahead. 322 00:32:22,991 --> 00:32:25,204 Hey, hey. All right, just a minute. 323 00:32:25,228 --> 00:32:27,739 Look, listen to me. Listen to me. Look. 324 00:32:27,763 --> 00:32:32,012 You're gonna stay here until you straighten out. No ifs, no ands, no buts. 325 00:32:32,036 --> 00:32:35,316 You're gonna sleep right there in that cabana. 326 00:32:35,340 --> 00:32:38,852 Cabana? Yeah. All right, come on, help out here. 327 00:32:38,876 --> 00:32:42,857 No ifs, no ands, no buts. Give me a hand. Come on. 328 00:32:42,881 --> 00:32:46,228 Let's go over here. Right there. 329 00:32:46,252 --> 00:32:49,273 That's it. There we go. 330 00:33:17,053 --> 00:33:19,932 Hello, darling. Hi. 331 00:33:19,956 --> 00:33:23,870 Can I give you a hand? Betty Ford clinic wouldn't take a dog. 332 00:33:23,894 --> 00:33:27,876 Did the pool man come? No, but the sprinklers are going crazy. 333 00:33:27,900 --> 00:33:32,213 That was a very brave thing you did. I told all the girls. 334 00:33:32,237 --> 00:33:35,884 So, what happened to the poor guy? He's in the hot tub. 335 00:33:35,908 --> 00:33:38,053 He's still here? What's the emergency number? 911? 336 00:33:38,077 --> 00:33:41,791 Barbara, I invited him to stay for a couple of days. 337 00:33:41,815 --> 00:33:45,329 He is not staying in my house. He's in the cabana. 338 00:33:45,353 --> 00:33:47,998 I'm calling Sidney. You need immediate treatment. 339 00:33:48,022 --> 00:33:50,835 You're overreacting to this a little, don't you think? 340 00:33:50,859 --> 00:33:53,471 You don't know this man. He's a bum, a derelict. 341 00:33:53,495 --> 00:33:57,309 His sister died of leukemia. I know something about him. 342 00:33:57,333 --> 00:34:00,313 He could steal everything... His name is Jerry. 343 00:34:00,337 --> 00:34:03,783 And then murder us in our beds! Barbara, Matisse loves him. 344 00:34:03,807 --> 00:34:07,086 Look. That should be a clue right there. Matisse loves no one. 345 00:34:07,110 --> 00:34:09,122 Look for yourself. 346 00:34:09,146 --> 00:34:14,028 Okay, stay. Walk. Okay, good boy. 347 00:34:14,052 --> 00:34:18,202 Good boy. He's gonna give that dog fleas. 348 00:34:18,957 --> 00:34:21,938 Isn't that something? 349 00:34:21,962 --> 00:34:25,982 And it'll be your fault. Come on, look at that. Barbara. 350 00:34:51,160 --> 00:34:56,176 - What do you think? - - Either bump him off or make him a partner. 351 00:34:56,200 --> 00:35:00,482 Fred c. Dobbs ain't a guy likes to be taken advantage of. 352 00:35:00,506 --> 00:35:03,317 Do the mug in, I say. Goin' south, isn't he? 353 00:35:03,341 --> 00:35:05,561 Let him have it! 354 00:35:23,932 --> 00:35:26,944 You got any low-Cal root beer? Jesus Christ, you scared me! 355 00:35:26,968 --> 00:35:30,348 I can't sleep in that bed. Why not? Is it too hard? 356 00:35:30,372 --> 00:35:34,092 No, it's too soft. I'm used to sidewalks. 357 00:35:37,379 --> 00:35:41,895 I'll make you a bagel and you can take it to your room. 358 00:35:41,919 --> 00:35:45,065 I can't eat it in that room. Why not? 359 00:35:45,089 --> 00:35:48,869 I haven't had a room to eat in in three years. 360 00:35:48,893 --> 00:35:54,044 You'll like this. It's one of my specialties. All right. 361 00:35:57,437 --> 00:36:02,453 It's the onions and the tomatoes that does the trick. Oh. 362 00:36:02,477 --> 00:36:06,790 I haven't had one of these since my Brooklyn days. Are you from Brooklyn? 363 00:36:06,814 --> 00:36:08,825 Flatbush Ave. No kidding. 364 00:36:08,849 --> 00:36:11,928 Yeah. Huh. I grew up around Ebbet's Field. 365 00:36:11,952 --> 00:36:15,968 Yeah? Oh, I loved baseball back in those days. Oh, yeah. 366 00:36:15,992 --> 00:36:18,804 Yeah. You remember Duke snider? 367 00:36:18,828 --> 00:36:21,073 Oh. He was my idol. 368 00:36:21,097 --> 00:36:23,076 Roy Campanella. Yeah. 369 00:36:23,100 --> 00:36:26,079 Carl Erskine. There was a tough cookie. Tough guy, yeah. 370 00:36:26,103 --> 00:36:28,782 Hey, you remember Ralph Branca? Oh. 371 00:36:28,806 --> 00:36:32,126 The right-handed pitcher? Remember him? Yeah. 372 00:36:34,212 --> 00:36:35,524 And Bobby Thomson that time? 373 00:36:35,548 --> 00:36:38,093 Pete Reiser? Remember? He ran into center field? 374 00:36:38,117 --> 00:36:40,862 Tough day. '57 season, Drysdale won us... 375 00:36:40,886 --> 00:36:42,864 Seventeen games. Seventeen games. 376 00:36:42,888 --> 00:36:46,503 Seventeen games. Whoa. Yeah, that was amazing. 377 00:36:46,527 --> 00:36:48,971 After a year, they moved the team. Yeah. 378 00:36:48,995 --> 00:36:51,941 Whew. I was that big. 379 00:36:51,965 --> 00:36:54,456 I cried. 380 00:36:55,903 --> 00:36:59,050 How about that low-Cal root beer? Low-Cal. 381 00:36:59,074 --> 00:37:01,224 Right. You got it. 382 00:37:05,814 --> 00:37:07,960 Hey, Jerry. Hmm? 383 00:37:07,984 --> 00:37:10,896 You ever think about going straight? You know, gettin' a job? 384 00:37:10,920 --> 00:37:13,967 I tried it. I played the game; I lost. 385 00:37:13,991 --> 00:37:16,870 You get tired of playing a losing game. What are you talking about? 386 00:37:16,894 --> 00:37:20,141 All you need is a little luck, buddy. Look at me. 387 00:37:20,165 --> 00:37:23,044 I'm serious. Look at me. I was selling lingerie... 388 00:37:23,068 --> 00:37:26,047 From the back seat of my father's Oldsmobile. 389 00:37:26,071 --> 00:37:30,085 Look, you gotta be in the right place at the right time. 390 00:37:30,109 --> 00:37:32,989 You understand? I went into a bar in New Jersey. 391 00:37:33,013 --> 00:37:34,891 I struck up a conversation with a guy. 392 00:37:34,915 --> 00:37:37,226 He's putting up a string of motels. 393 00:37:37,250 --> 00:37:40,263 So I borrowed some money from my Uncle Maurie. 394 00:37:40,287 --> 00:37:44,401 Do you think I knew I was going to be in the hanger business? The rest is history. 395 00:37:44,425 --> 00:37:48,773 What is this, an all-night diner? Hi, Barb. 396 00:37:48,797 --> 00:37:51,578 You eating again, Dave? Well, it's your colon. 397 00:37:51,602 --> 00:37:56,515 And don't drop food on the floor and make a mess for me to clean. 398 00:37:56,539 --> 00:37:58,551 I thought I heard a rat. 399 00:37:58,575 --> 00:38:02,054 Maybe that's what I heard. Lot of rats in Beverly Hills. 400 00:38:02,078 --> 00:38:04,057 Rats are everywhere. Yeah. 401 00:38:04,081 --> 00:38:07,227 Dave, I think I'd like to talk to Jerry alone. 402 00:38:07,251 --> 00:38:09,898 Sure, Barb. 403 00:38:09,922 --> 00:38:12,972 Well, come, Jerry. 404 00:38:31,512 --> 00:38:33,632 I missed you. 405 00:38:36,085 --> 00:38:38,245 Sit. Anywhere. 406 00:38:47,932 --> 00:38:51,411 Jerry, I'd like to apologize to you for how I've behaved. 407 00:38:51,435 --> 00:38:53,948 You have to know, I've objected to your presence here. 408 00:38:53,972 --> 00:38:56,984 Frankly, your appearance scares me. I... 409 00:38:57,008 --> 00:39:00,255 there's something very threatening about you. 410 00:39:00,279 --> 00:39:04,025 Um, I realize that this is completely superficial, and that underneath all that... 411 00:39:04,049 --> 00:39:07,263 You are undoubtedly a wonderful person... 412 00:39:07,287 --> 00:39:09,967 With wonderful human qualities. 413 00:39:09,991 --> 00:39:14,137 I'm trying so hard to overcome my middle-class prejudices. You know, 414 00:39:14,161 --> 00:39:18,776 my yogi, my guru, my guide, Ranbir, always says... 415 00:39:18,800 --> 00:39:21,846 That we are all part of the same oneness, 416 00:39:21,870 --> 00:39:25,317 the same universal electric tide; We flow into and out of everything. 417 00:39:25,341 --> 00:39:29,121 So, as a human being, I... 418 00:39:29,145 --> 00:39:32,158 I want you to know that I respect you. I do. 419 00:39:32,182 --> 00:39:35,672 And I, I hope you understand me. 420 00:39:57,544 --> 00:40:00,056 Sí, sí, Jesus. No problema. 421 00:40:00,080 --> 00:40:03,862 I just want to be sure your people know all about the bonuses. 422 00:40:03,886 --> 00:40:05,706 Okay. Sí, adios. 423 00:40:09,091 --> 00:40:13,071 What? Your first ride in a Rolls Royce? 424 00:40:15,899 --> 00:40:18,089 You lived in London? Graduate school. 425 00:40:27,980 --> 00:40:31,960 "Congratulations to Mr. Dave Whiteman, president of Dav-Bar. 426 00:40:31,984 --> 00:40:36,866 "This gold hanger honors your sale of one million hangers... 427 00:40:36,890 --> 00:40:39,434 To the Holiday Inn." That baby revolutionized the business. 428 00:40:39,458 --> 00:40:44,019 See, you got a magnetic lock. We make that baby at my plant in Tijuana. 429 00:41:12,496 --> 00:41:16,076 - Maurice, this is Jerry. - The gentleman you spoke of? 430 00:41:16,100 --> 00:41:19,080 Indeed. You have the look of the vagabond, monsieur. 431 00:41:19,104 --> 00:41:23,319 Tres, tres chic. Sit down. What I was thinking of, Maurice, 432 00:41:23,343 --> 00:41:26,393 was that you ought to just, you know, clean him up. 433 00:42:02,387 --> 00:42:05,367 500,000 hangers a day. 434 00:42:05,391 --> 00:42:09,872 You know what that means, 500,000 hangers a day? At four cents a hanger? 435 00:42:09,896 --> 00:42:14,576 And we don't have any salesmen? Do you know what that means? That's the beauty part. 436 00:42:14,600 --> 00:42:19,583 Hey, Bobby. Good to see ya. Yeah, this is where Dav-Bar started. 437 00:42:19,607 --> 00:42:24,388 A lot of hangers. Hey, Raymondo. 438 00:42:24,412 --> 00:42:26,891 Right now, we're negotiating with the Chinese. 439 00:42:26,915 --> 00:42:30,929 We're going to have a very big party new year's Eve... 440 00:42:30,953 --> 00:42:32,931 For the minister of trade, Mr. Chan. 441 00:42:32,955 --> 00:42:37,103 You know what that could mean? 850 million Chinese? 442 00:42:37,127 --> 00:42:40,107 200 million hangers every year, minimum. 443 00:42:40,131 --> 00:42:43,543 The Chinese are very neat people. Yeah, you hardly ever see a Chinese bum. 444 00:42:43,567 --> 00:42:46,279 You want a job, Jer? You give me the word, 445 00:42:46,303 --> 00:42:49,850 I'll give you a job tomorrow. What do you say? 446 00:42:49,874 --> 00:42:54,695 Start you on the line, get your feet wet in shipping. Not really my line, Dave. 447 00:42:55,314 --> 00:42:58,060 You kill me, I swear. 448 00:42:58,084 --> 00:43:01,097 We got a good health plan. Just put in comprehensive dental. 449 00:43:01,121 --> 00:43:03,866 Alesio, alesio. ¿comã³ estã¡? Show him your teeth. 450 00:43:03,890 --> 00:43:07,037 See? You gotta worry about things like that, Jer. 451 00:43:07,061 --> 00:43:09,805 Can we grab some lunch? Sure, sure. 452 00:43:09,829 --> 00:43:13,281 When your teeth go... you know what I'm talking about. 453 00:43:18,074 --> 00:43:21,419 Would you like another bottle of Beaujolais, Mr. Whiteman? 454 00:43:21,443 --> 00:43:25,304 Uh, what do you say, Mr., uh, Mr. Baskin? 455 00:43:26,349 --> 00:43:29,729 No. Could use another piece of chicken, though. 456 00:43:37,862 --> 00:43:41,909 Didn't I see you at the Cannes film festival? Probably. 457 00:43:41,933 --> 00:43:45,281 You were with Susan Sarandon. Something to do with Nicaragua. 458 00:43:45,305 --> 00:43:47,283 Are you a Sandinista? No, no. 459 00:43:47,307 --> 00:43:49,851 Wait, I know. You're Sandy Kinney's boyfriend. 460 00:43:49,875 --> 00:43:52,922 You're a writer. What's your name? Jerry baskin. 461 00:43:52,946 --> 00:43:57,128 That's right. Oh, Roxanne... Philobosian. How do you do? 462 00:43:57,152 --> 00:43:59,330 Dave Whiteman. Hi. 463 00:43:59,354 --> 00:44:03,301 I'm over at MGM now. Call me if you get any story ideas. 464 00:44:03,325 --> 00:44:05,645 We're really looking. Oh... 465 00:44:07,863 --> 00:44:09,974 Here's my card. 466 00:44:11,901 --> 00:44:16,061 Oh, say hello to Sandy for me. Bye, Dave. 467 00:44:19,144 --> 00:44:21,464 So you're a writer? 468 00:44:23,881 --> 00:44:25,959 Al. Al! 469 00:44:25,983 --> 00:44:29,865 Hey, Al. Al! Come here. 470 00:44:29,889 --> 00:44:32,469 Yeah, come here. Come here. 471 00:44:33,893 --> 00:44:37,873 Al... Al, it's me, Jerry. 472 00:44:37,897 --> 00:44:40,148 Jerry! All right! 473 00:44:46,274 --> 00:44:48,886 Can Al join us? Oh, sure, sure. 474 00:44:48,910 --> 00:44:52,824 He's a human being, just like you and me. Why don't you... 475 00:44:52,848 --> 00:44:56,038 you sure it's okay? Yeah, come right on around. 476 00:44:59,055 --> 00:45:02,235 Yamato, could we have another chair? Thank you very much. 477 00:45:02,259 --> 00:45:04,937 Thank you so much. Sit down right here. 478 00:45:04,961 --> 00:45:07,575 Dave Whiteman. Hey, brother. Al. 479 00:45:07,599 --> 00:45:09,943 Nice to meet you. Man, you sure look different. 480 00:45:09,967 --> 00:45:13,115 It's the hair and the beard. I hardly recognized you. 481 00:45:13,139 --> 00:45:15,117 I thought I was hearing voices. 482 00:45:15,141 --> 00:45:18,287 Would you like something to eat? No, thank you. 483 00:45:18,311 --> 00:45:21,290 Are you expecting any more in your party, Mr. Whiteman? 484 00:45:21,314 --> 00:45:24,294 No, no, here, yamato. Here, just take it. 485 00:45:24,318 --> 00:45:27,431 Take it. Take it. 486 00:45:27,455 --> 00:45:32,203 Would you like some wine? No, this is one of my non-drinking days. 487 00:45:32,227 --> 00:45:35,207 Al was down at the mission with me. 488 00:45:35,231 --> 00:45:39,977 You remember red Turner? You know, redhead cat with the glasses. 489 00:45:40,001 --> 00:45:43,115 Oh, yeah. He got mugged real bad, man. 490 00:45:43,139 --> 00:45:48,122 He down in the county hospital. Red was pretty old, Al. 491 00:45:48,146 --> 00:45:50,990 They make a very good club sandwich here... 492 00:45:51,014 --> 00:45:53,560 you're sittin' pretty. 493 00:45:53,584 --> 00:45:58,505 Goddamn. Lookin' good, baby. Yeah. I got to go. 494 00:46:01,160 --> 00:46:04,173 Uh, you don't mind me saying so, Jer, 495 00:46:04,197 --> 00:46:08,345 some of these guys on the street seem a little crazy. 496 00:46:08,369 --> 00:46:13,316 Ah, Matisse. What a lovely dog you are. Such a pretty dog. 497 00:46:13,340 --> 00:46:17,454 And such pretty eyes you have. What a lovely dog. 498 00:46:17,478 --> 00:46:20,924 I hear you're not eating, Matisse. 499 00:46:20,948 --> 00:46:24,509 Dr. Von Zimmer has some food for you. Here you are. 500 00:46:27,523 --> 00:46:29,501 Oh, Matisse. 501 00:46:29,525 --> 00:46:32,276 You're very angry, aren't you? 502 00:46:34,464 --> 00:46:37,610 Shh. What? Oh, are you ever angry. 503 00:46:37,634 --> 00:46:42,284 The dog bite the colored guy? Ha! Matisse hasn't eaten in three days. 504 00:46:42,308 --> 00:46:44,552 We got an anorexic dog. 505 00:46:44,576 --> 00:46:48,623 You've got a disturbed dog. Something's bothering Matisse. 506 00:46:48,647 --> 00:46:52,361 Matisse is very angry. The dog is a loser. 507 00:46:52,385 --> 00:46:56,232 What a way to talk about a beautiful dog like this. 508 00:46:56,256 --> 00:47:01,205 What a way to talk. He's just disturbed and angry. 509 00:47:01,229 --> 00:47:05,176 Has there been something new in the household? Some new living arrangement? 510 00:47:05,200 --> 00:47:08,846 - We have a house guest. - How long are you staying? 511 00:47:08,870 --> 00:47:11,316 He's staying as long as he likes. 512 00:47:11,340 --> 00:47:15,987 If the doggie doesn't like it, then the doggie can find new arrangements. 513 00:47:16,011 --> 00:47:20,527 Oh, well, the hostility in your voice, you know, affects animals. 514 00:47:20,551 --> 00:47:23,162 And the dog picks up on it. 515 00:47:23,186 --> 00:47:26,267 What this dog needs is love and reassurance. 516 00:47:26,291 --> 00:47:29,237 And he needs love and reassurance from you. Mm-hmm. 517 00:47:29,261 --> 00:47:32,906 He's the one that has the problem, with you. Uh-huh. 518 00:47:32,930 --> 00:47:36,911 You must caress this dog, and hold him, hug him, give him some affection. 519 00:47:36,935 --> 00:47:39,882 Pardon me? Dave. You must go over and caress... 520 00:47:39,906 --> 00:47:43,185 the dog is running the whole house. Hold this dog. 521 00:47:43,209 --> 00:47:47,358 This dog needs reassurance, love, attention from you. Okay, okay. 522 00:47:47,382 --> 00:47:51,194 I like you. I mean real affection, not pseudo, but deep affection. 523 00:47:51,218 --> 00:47:54,898 You're nice. I like you. Give the dog a hug. 524 00:47:54,922 --> 00:47:57,302 He needs reassurance. He needs to be held. 525 00:47:57,326 --> 00:48:00,473 He needs to be touched. 526 00:48:00,497 --> 00:48:03,141 Come give him a hug. Give me a break here! 527 00:48:03,165 --> 00:48:05,210 Well, get with it. Nice dog. 528 00:48:05,234 --> 00:48:09,154 Nice dog, all right? You're a very nice dog. 529 00:48:12,175 --> 00:48:15,323 When your guest leaves, Matisse will be voracious. 530 00:48:15,347 --> 00:48:18,493 He'll be okay. I wouldn't worry about that. 531 00:48:18,517 --> 00:48:22,898 But he has other problems. I believe he suffers from nipple anxiety. 532 00:48:22,922 --> 00:48:28,103 Probably came from a nine-dog litter. Now, about my fee... 533 00:48:28,127 --> 00:48:29,738 listen to this, Matisse. 534 00:48:29,762 --> 00:48:34,478 "If your dog has a fit, he runs around aimlessly, barking hysterically, 535 00:48:34,502 --> 00:48:37,915 "starry-eyed, foaming at the mouth, completely beyond control... 536 00:48:37,939 --> 00:48:42,854 "'Til he finally collapses, exhausted, often defecating and urinating. 537 00:48:42,878 --> 00:48:46,090 "He becomes stiff and starry-eyed, 538 00:48:46,114 --> 00:48:48,927 "clamping his jaws, foaming at the mouth, staggers and falls on his backside, 539 00:48:48,951 --> 00:48:51,330 "with his legs pumping convulsively in the air. 540 00:48:51,354 --> 00:48:56,336 The fit is not a disease, but a sign that something is wrong"? Bullshit. 541 00:48:58,463 --> 00:49:01,342 Matisse! He's just trying to say hello. 542 00:49:01,366 --> 00:49:04,446 Hello. Thank you. 543 00:49:04,470 --> 00:49:08,990 - Are you Iranian? - Yes, but we live here now, in Beverly Hills. 544 00:49:09,675 --> 00:49:12,220 Me too. My name is Jerry. 545 00:49:12,244 --> 00:49:14,564 I am Amir. 546 00:49:16,049 --> 00:49:19,195 - You want an apple, Amir? - Oh, thank you, Jerry. 547 00:49:19,219 --> 00:49:21,339 Here, catch. 548 00:49:27,261 --> 00:49:31,312 Matisse! Stop that, or I'll call Dr. Von Zimmer. 549 00:49:36,372 --> 00:49:40,186 I was listenin' to what that psychiatrist said about your dog. 550 00:49:40,210 --> 00:49:43,556 Dr. Von Zimmer seems to think you're the problem. 551 00:49:43,580 --> 00:49:46,058 Could be. Matisse is a picky eater. 552 00:49:46,082 --> 00:49:49,864 I've tried everything, bought every kind of dog food there is. 553 00:49:49,888 --> 00:49:54,008 Where do you keep it? In the cupboard by the fridge. 554 00:49:55,428 --> 00:49:57,618 Oh, mighty dog corned beef. 555 00:50:00,534 --> 00:50:05,047 There. You see your dog, this dog, thinks it's human. 556 00:50:05,071 --> 00:50:07,883 There are no dogs around to teach it, 557 00:50:07,907 --> 00:50:12,256 so it's got no dog friends and no dog family, nothin' to relate to. 558 00:50:12,280 --> 00:50:17,261 So it thinks human. Wants to eat what you're eating. Not that stuff you eat. 559 00:50:17,285 --> 00:50:21,534 Taste's important. You got a bowl? 560 00:50:21,558 --> 00:50:23,708 Yes. Certainly. 561 00:50:28,231 --> 00:50:33,147 Mighty dog's good, but that gourmet pup you got, that's way, way too salty. 562 00:50:33,171 --> 00:50:35,950 How do you know? This is nutritious. 563 00:50:35,974 --> 00:50:38,919 It's got all your minerals, vitamins, all your requirements. 564 00:50:38,943 --> 00:50:43,959 Many a day I wished I had a plate of puppy chow to munch on. 565 00:50:43,983 --> 00:50:46,996 People treat their dogs better than humans. 566 00:50:47,020 --> 00:50:51,000 That's one-third mighty dog, one-third Kal Kan with liver, 567 00:50:51,024 --> 00:50:54,474 and you use puppy chow to add texture, crunchiness. 568 00:51:27,499 --> 00:51:30,946 He put the bowl on the floor, put his nose in it and ate it... 569 00:51:30,970 --> 00:51:34,182 Like it was pate from Maxim's of Paris. Didn't I tell you? 570 00:51:34,206 --> 00:51:36,485 What? He has a kind of wisdom. 571 00:51:36,509 --> 00:51:39,956 Oh, please. I still don't trust the guy. 572 00:51:39,980 --> 00:51:44,895 Oh, I gave him the burglar alarm code. Why didn't you give him a credit card? 573 00:51:44,919 --> 00:51:48,633 Carmen told me it would be easier for her to shop... 574 00:51:48,657 --> 00:51:51,570 If you gave her her own Mastercharge. Really? 575 00:51:51,594 --> 00:51:54,339 Maybe Jerry and Carmen will invite us over for dinner. 576 00:51:54,363 --> 00:51:58,513 Does the concept "schmuck" mean anything to you, Dave? 577 00:52:00,536 --> 00:52:02,014 Good night, Barb. 578 00:52:02,038 --> 00:52:04,885 Yes, I do. I have spares here. 579 00:52:04,909 --> 00:52:07,599 Somebody cooked my chicken. 580 00:52:32,439 --> 00:52:35,386 - Hey, Jerry, how ya doin'? - Yeah, got my packet? 581 00:52:35,410 --> 00:52:38,422 Yeah, packet. Checkin' in for a while? No, no. 582 00:52:38,446 --> 00:52:42,527 Do I have any mail? Yeah, you got book of the month club. 583 00:52:42,551 --> 00:52:45,565 You look pretty sharp. Hey, thanks for holding this. 584 00:52:45,589 --> 00:52:48,602 You hear about red Turner? No. 585 00:52:48,626 --> 00:52:51,605 He caught a cab. Red was pretty old. 586 00:52:51,629 --> 00:52:54,309 - Seventy-nine. - Yeah. Come on. 587 00:52:56,567 --> 00:52:59,788 Good morning. Sign down there at the bottom. 588 00:53:05,110 --> 00:53:07,391 You got a license? Yeah. 589 00:53:09,683 --> 00:53:13,996 You drive. Where to? 590 00:53:14,020 --> 00:53:18,001 I don't know. Some days, you just want to take off. Yeah. 591 00:53:18,025 --> 00:53:22,006 All right, let's hit the beach. I got some friends down there. 592 00:53:22,030 --> 00:53:24,609 The beach? Who's gonna run my business? 593 00:53:24,633 --> 00:53:28,312 Who's gonna pay my bills? You gotta be kiddin' me. 594 00:53:28,336 --> 00:53:32,351 You have any idea how much it costs to run my business? 595 00:53:32,375 --> 00:53:37,257 You got enough money to last ten lifetimes. Maybe I ought to be a bum. 596 00:53:37,281 --> 00:53:40,527 You know? No more hangers, no more responsibilities. 597 00:53:40,551 --> 00:53:44,541 You wouldn't last a half-hour. Think so? 598 00:53:45,724 --> 00:53:49,114 Hit the beach, buddy. Pronto. 599 00:54:06,047 --> 00:54:08,807 So, it's like the '60s. 600 00:54:16,526 --> 00:54:21,173 Tom Tom! Jerry, damn. Look at you, man. 601 00:54:21,197 --> 00:54:25,045 You look like a damn yuppie or somethin'. Good to see you, buddy. 602 00:54:25,069 --> 00:54:29,216 This is my friend Dave. Hey, you want a drink, white man? There you go. 603 00:54:29,240 --> 00:54:31,384 How'd he know my name? Look here. 604 00:54:31,408 --> 00:54:36,058 This is my buddy, big ed, and peaches. Big ed? Hi, peaches. 605 00:54:36,082 --> 00:54:39,661 On the guitar is my friend Patrick. Patrick, how are you? 606 00:54:39,685 --> 00:54:42,698 This is my lady, Dorothy. Dorothy, how do you do? 607 00:54:42,722 --> 00:54:45,935 I do fine. How do you do? Very good. 608 00:54:45,959 --> 00:54:48,204 Drink up. Man, Jerry. Yeah, yeah. 609 00:54:48,228 --> 00:54:51,174 All right. 610 00:54:51,198 --> 00:54:53,177 Tom Tom, huh? That your real name? 611 00:54:53,201 --> 00:54:56,180 Hell, no, my real and true name is Daniel Whitefeather. 612 00:54:56,204 --> 00:54:58,383 Whitefeather. That's a very beautiful name. 613 00:54:58,407 --> 00:55:02,054 Yeah, beautiful. My Indian name is Nanatatche. 614 00:55:02,078 --> 00:55:05,090 Nanatatcheta. Yeah, it means... 615 00:55:05,114 --> 00:55:09,028 He who lost his American express card and don't give a fuck. 616 00:55:09,052 --> 00:55:12,632 Right! Yeah! That's very funny. 617 00:55:12,656 --> 00:55:14,935 You like that one, huh? Yeah. 618 00:55:14,959 --> 00:55:18,138 Drink up, man. Merry Christmas. Shit. 619 00:55:18,162 --> 00:55:20,375 Aw hell. 620 00:55:20,399 --> 00:55:22,519 One more time! 621 00:55:33,014 --> 00:55:35,058 Hello? Hello. 622 00:55:35,082 --> 00:55:36,994 Aw, Dave, are you all right? Yeah. 623 00:55:37,018 --> 00:55:40,497 I called the police, your parents. I called Sidney. I'm okay. 624 00:55:40,521 --> 00:55:45,403 I'm at the beach with Jerry, and I've decided to spend the night. 625 00:55:45,427 --> 00:55:48,172 Dave, are you drunk? 626 00:55:48,196 --> 00:55:50,742 I'm okay. There's nothin' to worry about. 627 00:55:50,766 --> 00:55:53,679 I'm at the beach with Jerry and his friends, 628 00:55:53,703 --> 00:55:57,683 Patrick and Tom Tom and ed and, and Dorothy. 629 00:55:57,707 --> 00:56:02,157 - Dorothy who? - I'll see you manana, Barbara. 630 00:56:05,716 --> 00:56:08,266 I knew that bum was trouble. 631 00:56:11,958 --> 00:56:15,138 - Hey, Dave. - Yeah. 632 00:56:15,162 --> 00:56:19,175 How long you been diddlin' Carmen? What are you talkin' about? 633 00:56:19,199 --> 00:56:22,378 It's okay by me. She's a hot little number. 634 00:56:22,402 --> 00:56:27,384 Barb's a handsome woman too. Hey, you know how long I've been married to Barbara? 635 00:56:27,408 --> 00:56:29,629 No. Forever. 636 00:56:33,315 --> 00:56:35,393 You ever been married? Twice. 637 00:56:35,417 --> 00:56:40,232 You know how sometimes you get stuck in the horse latitudes now and then? Yeah. 638 00:56:40,256 --> 00:56:43,369 Dead calm in the water? Yeah. 639 00:56:43,393 --> 00:56:47,174 You need somethin' to, you know... you needa little hot somethin'. 640 00:56:47,198 --> 00:56:49,177 Yeah, spice it up a little. 641 00:56:49,201 --> 00:56:53,081 Barbara ought to have a fling too. I'm serious. It would do her good. 642 00:56:53,105 --> 00:56:56,385 Get her started again, you know? Yeah. 643 00:56:58,410 --> 00:57:00,531 I love her, you know. 644 00:57:03,049 --> 00:57:04,569 I believe you. I believe you, Dave. 645 00:57:08,522 --> 00:57:11,413 Tell me something. Yeah. 646 00:57:13,561 --> 00:57:16,311 You really been married twice? Nah. 647 00:57:22,038 --> 00:57:25,089 I was just kiddin' ya. I knew it. 648 00:57:29,712 --> 00:57:33,560 You really an actor? "What a piece of work is man. 649 00:57:33,584 --> 00:57:36,630 "How noble in reason, 650 00:57:36,654 --> 00:57:39,233 "how infinite in faculty. 651 00:57:39,257 --> 00:57:42,536 "In form and moving, how express and admirable. 652 00:57:42,560 --> 00:57:45,374 "In action, how like an angel. 653 00:57:45,398 --> 00:57:48,410 "In apprehension, how like a god. 654 00:57:48,434 --> 00:57:52,284 "The beauty of the world, the paragon of animals. 655 00:57:53,639 --> 00:57:56,253 "Yet to me, 656 00:57:56,277 --> 00:57:59,127 what is this quintessence of dust?" 657 00:58:25,676 --> 00:58:28,090 I will never, ever forgive you! 658 00:58:28,114 --> 00:58:30,525 This disgusting derelict is responsible. Barbara... 659 00:58:30,549 --> 00:58:35,097 I spent the night with some poor, oppressed human beings. You stink! 660 00:58:35,121 --> 00:58:39,668 They live like animals, but they have great capacity for joy. I was panic-stricken. 661 00:58:39,692 --> 00:58:43,207 I ate garbage last night, Barbara, and I loved it. 662 00:58:43,231 --> 00:58:46,510 Great! You can have garbage for dinner tonight too! 663 00:58:46,534 --> 00:58:50,115 I learned to beg. A total stranger gave me 50â¢. 664 00:58:50,139 --> 00:58:53,951 Put it right in my hand. I think I'll take a shower... 665 00:58:53,975 --> 00:58:58,723 And grab some breakfast. You are pushing me to my limits, both of you. 666 00:58:58,747 --> 00:59:01,069 Shower in the cabana. 667 00:59:06,257 --> 00:59:08,747 You want to hit the beach, amigo? 668 00:59:12,097 --> 00:59:14,675 Walter, that's a difficult problem, incest. 669 00:59:14,699 --> 00:59:18,713 We'll try to help you. We'll give you some numbers to refer to. 670 00:59:18,737 --> 00:59:23,753 You get some further help. Let's take one more call before the hour's up. Hello? 671 00:59:23,777 --> 00:59:28,724 My name is dawn, and I live in Toluca Lake. I'm 26 years old. 672 00:59:28,748 --> 00:59:32,062 We have dawn from toluca lake. Hello, dawn. 673 00:59:32,086 --> 00:59:34,331 Dr. Grant, I'm a nervous wreck. 674 00:59:34,355 --> 00:59:38,103 My husband has brought a bum home to live with us. 675 00:59:38,127 --> 00:59:41,606 That sounds like a very uncomfortable situation. 676 00:59:41,630 --> 00:59:44,009 Is this a displaced person? 677 00:59:44,033 --> 00:59:47,413 Yeah, it's a street person. A vagrant. 678 00:59:47,437 --> 00:59:51,016 And he lives with you? Yes, he lives in my house, 679 00:59:51,040 --> 00:59:53,452 in the cabana out by the pool. 680 00:59:53,476 --> 00:59:58,459 This is starting to sound like a real problem, at least for your husband. 681 00:59:58,483 --> 01:00:01,962 Is your husband a happy man, dawn? Not lately. 682 01:00:01,986 --> 01:00:06,768 It's possible, dawn, that your husband is living a vicariously freer life... 683 01:00:06,792 --> 01:00:10,639 Through the presence of this displaced person he's brought home. 684 01:00:10,663 --> 01:00:14,076 Have you thought about that? Well, let's not talk... 685 01:00:14,100 --> 01:00:16,079 About him right... for now. 686 01:00:16,103 --> 01:00:20,084 How's your personal relationship with him, your sex life? 687 01:00:20,108 --> 01:00:24,222 - What sex life? - Well, I see we need to talk a little more. 688 01:00:24,246 --> 01:00:26,766 Let's take a break for a commercial. 689 01:01:01,622 --> 01:01:03,802 Another headache? 690 01:01:06,460 --> 01:01:09,339 It's chronic. 691 01:01:09,363 --> 01:01:13,612 Where'd you learn that? At an ashram in Oregon. 692 01:01:13,636 --> 01:01:17,126 - You were in an ashram? - Yep. 693 01:01:20,476 --> 01:01:23,390 Maybe I can help you with your headache. 694 01:01:23,414 --> 01:01:25,794 I doubt it. 695 01:01:26,717 --> 01:01:28,728 Maybe. 696 01:01:28,752 --> 01:01:31,465 Hello, Dr. Grant? Hello? 697 01:01:31,489 --> 01:01:36,238 My name is Bob, I'm 27, and I'm no longer attracted to my wife. 698 01:01:36,262 --> 01:01:40,141 How long have you felt this way, Bob? About 9 1/2 years. 699 01:01:40,165 --> 01:01:45,146 Was it ever any good? No, it was great, fabulous. It was my whole life. 700 01:01:45,170 --> 01:01:48,418 What changed? I don't know. She started decorating the house. 701 01:01:48,442 --> 01:01:51,322 She's always in a class somewhere. 702 01:01:51,346 --> 01:01:53,856 What... you stupid son of a bitch! 703 01:01:56,585 --> 01:01:59,431 Hey, Mr. Rolls Royce, you know what you did to my car? 704 01:01:59,455 --> 01:02:04,436 Are you some kind of moron? Sir, may I see your driver's license, please? 705 01:02:04,460 --> 01:02:08,006 Uh, yeah, yeah. Who, who, who hit who? 706 01:02:08,030 --> 01:02:10,244 May I see your driver's license? Uh-huh! 707 01:02:10,268 --> 01:02:14,281 I'm just trying to figure out who I'm mad at. I, I, I'm not... 708 01:02:14,305 --> 01:02:19,086 I'm going to have to ask you to step out of the car. Yes, sir. Yes, sir. 709 01:02:19,110 --> 01:02:22,230 Did I hit you or did you... 710 01:02:28,388 --> 01:02:31,200 Listen... 711 01:02:31,224 --> 01:02:34,437 In the ashram, we learned some massage techniques. 712 01:02:34,461 --> 01:02:37,307 Specifically Balinese massage. Now, it's very powerful, 713 01:02:37,331 --> 01:02:39,776 and it's very effective. I don't think so. I'm a little tense. 714 01:02:39,800 --> 01:02:44,448 A little tense. I'd say you're rigid. I'm angry at you, 715 01:02:44,472 --> 01:02:48,219 and I'm angry at Dave for going off with you. Uh-huh, that's understandable, 716 01:02:48,243 --> 01:02:53,225 but you've got to learn to release your anger. Just let it go. 717 01:02:53,249 --> 01:02:55,461 I had acupressure, but it didn't work. 718 01:02:55,485 --> 01:02:58,431 Well, of course not. That's the wrong Karma. 719 01:02:58,455 --> 01:03:02,468 See, headaches are mostly related to the buildup of tension and anxiety. 720 01:03:02,492 --> 01:03:04,505 Now... Ow! 721 01:03:04,529 --> 01:03:07,409 Good. Come on, now lie down, lie down. 722 01:03:07,433 --> 01:03:09,611 No. No, come on now, lie down. 723 01:03:09,635 --> 01:03:11,755 Lie down. Lie down. 724 01:03:14,441 --> 01:03:18,487 Now listen, you have to learn to release your anxiety and your tension. 725 01:03:18,511 --> 01:03:22,291 It's very difficult for me to release my anxiety. I understand. 726 01:03:22,315 --> 01:03:26,130 First, I'm going to use my aura. 727 01:03:26,154 --> 01:03:28,766 I'm afraid. No, don't be afraid. Don't be afraid. 728 01:03:28,790 --> 01:03:31,636 It's all right. It's all right. 729 01:03:31,660 --> 01:03:35,172 I want you to breathe with me. Now, you ready? Breathe in. 730 01:03:35,196 --> 01:03:37,208 - Out. - Oh... 731 01:03:37,232 --> 01:03:41,146 Good. In. Out. 732 01:03:41,170 --> 01:03:44,551 - Oh, good. - In. Out. 733 01:03:44,575 --> 01:03:48,155 Good, good, good. 734 01:03:48,179 --> 01:03:50,299 All right, good, good, good. 735 01:03:53,050 --> 01:03:55,663 That's good, good. All right, all right. 736 01:03:55,687 --> 01:03:57,837 Okay, now... 737 01:03:58,724 --> 01:04:00,802 Okay, give me this leg. 738 01:04:00,826 --> 01:04:03,038 Just give it to me. That's good. 739 01:04:03,062 --> 01:04:05,182 All right, you ready? All right. Yeah. 740 01:04:07,333 --> 01:04:10,481 Good, good. That's your body letting up. 741 01:04:10,505 --> 01:04:13,417 I think I see your aura. 742 01:04:13,441 --> 01:04:16,820 You have nice skin. Thank you. 743 01:04:16,844 --> 01:04:21,326 Oh, god. I'm so relaxed. 744 01:04:21,350 --> 01:04:23,770 All right, ready? 745 01:04:37,468 --> 01:04:40,229 Something strange is happening to me. 746 01:04:41,606 --> 01:04:46,121 I'm scared. I'm scared. Oh, that's all right. 747 01:04:46,145 --> 01:04:50,792 That's just your body letting it all go. Now just let it go. 748 01:04:50,816 --> 01:04:54,237 Let it go. Just let it go. 749 01:05:01,496 --> 01:05:04,443 Jerry, invade me. Jangle me. 750 01:05:04,467 --> 01:05:06,645 I need it, please! 751 01:05:06,669 --> 01:05:09,689 Don't stop. Don't deny me. 752 01:05:23,621 --> 01:05:26,612 Whoo-wee. My lord. 753 01:05:30,662 --> 01:05:33,882 My god! 754 01:05:38,472 --> 01:05:42,085 La 'illah ha, illa Allah! 755 01:05:42,109 --> 01:05:45,655 How long is this gonna take? I got hit here... oy. 756 01:05:45,679 --> 01:05:47,829 I just take 'em in, sir. 757 01:05:52,320 --> 01:05:56,468 I haven't had an orgasm like that in 9 1/2 years. 758 01:05:56,492 --> 01:06:00,339 I never thought I was capable of this. 759 01:06:00,363 --> 01:06:03,213 I'm ashamed of myself. I am. 760 01:06:05,335 --> 01:06:09,315 Glad and ashamed. Exhausted... 761 01:06:09,339 --> 01:06:11,785 And exhilarated all at the same time. 762 01:06:11,809 --> 01:06:15,790 Just as I was repelled and attracted to you at the same time. 763 01:06:15,814 --> 01:06:19,664 Yin/yang. You understand? It's just one of those things. 764 01:06:22,055 --> 01:06:26,235 Dave lost interest in me, and I lost interest in sex. 765 01:06:27,160 --> 01:06:29,171 I went shopping for gratification. 766 01:06:29,195 --> 01:06:32,316 But that's like sex without a climax, you know? 767 01:06:33,501 --> 01:06:38,583 God, I'm so loose. 768 01:06:38,607 --> 01:06:43,388 All the meditation, all the yoga, never got me to this place. 769 01:06:45,281 --> 01:06:48,226 You know, 770 01:06:48,250 --> 01:06:52,064 I'm well aware of what's going on between Dave and Carmen. 771 01:06:52,088 --> 01:06:56,771 I thought his confidence needed building, and I thought she could invigorate him for me. 772 01:06:56,795 --> 01:07:01,041 But all that time, I was denying myself. What power, what hate, 773 01:07:01,065 --> 01:07:05,079 building up inside of me like a volcano, and you unleashed it. 774 01:07:05,103 --> 01:07:07,515 You. Oh, Jerry, 775 01:07:07,539 --> 01:07:11,453 I'm so glad to be back in the real world again. 776 01:07:11,477 --> 01:07:16,638 Poor Dave. He's a passionate, sweet man. 777 01:07:18,485 --> 01:07:22,766 You found my g-spot, but this was a one-time trip to the moon. 778 01:07:22,790 --> 01:07:26,303 It happened, and there's nothing we can do about it. 779 01:07:26,327 --> 01:07:28,740 But no matter how fantastic it was, 780 01:07:28,764 --> 01:07:33,615 we can never repeat this adventure. I agree. 781 01:08:28,165 --> 01:08:31,955 I think you should go with something a little more orange. 782 01:08:40,679 --> 01:08:44,229 Mm-mm. There goes the neighborhood. 783 01:09:01,602 --> 01:09:05,350 Sir, thank you for speaking to my son Amir. 784 01:09:05,374 --> 01:09:09,935 He doesn't have any friends, and he's very lonely here in Beverly Hills. 785 01:09:15,085 --> 01:09:18,332 Perhaps you could come over for a coke and backgammon sometime. 786 01:09:18,356 --> 01:09:20,576 Anytime. Thank you. 787 01:09:37,143 --> 01:09:39,455 Hi, honey. 788 01:09:39,479 --> 01:09:41,600 Oy, what a day. 789 01:09:43,651 --> 01:09:45,941 Cop car smashed me from behind. 790 01:09:47,890 --> 01:09:52,237 Then the Iranian next door just gave Jerry $500... 791 01:09:52,261 --> 01:09:55,140 For talking to his son. Oh, honey, you look so tired. 792 01:09:55,164 --> 01:09:57,142 Can I fix you a drink? 793 01:09:57,166 --> 01:10:01,213 I know that's just an afternoon shopping at Neiman-Marcus to you, 794 01:10:01,237 --> 01:10:04,585 but to some people, it's still a lot of money. Let's see now. 795 01:10:04,609 --> 01:10:07,659 Ahem. Rum... 796 01:10:09,480 --> 01:10:13,571 Tonic water, and a slice of lime, right? Thank you. 797 01:10:16,522 --> 01:10:20,770 Sorry I yelled. I'm a little tense. Oh, that's okay, honey. 798 01:10:20,794 --> 01:10:22,806 Guess what? 799 01:10:22,830 --> 01:10:26,777 The man from the city of Beverly Hills came in today, 800 01:10:26,801 --> 01:10:31,181 and he told me that we have rats. 801 01:10:31,205 --> 01:10:35,656 Great big ones. White ones. Norwegian rats. 802 01:10:36,645 --> 01:10:38,665 It's an epidemic. 803 01:10:42,518 --> 01:10:45,832 Oh, honey, maybe they're just looking for some herring. 804 01:10:45,856 --> 01:10:48,668 Barbara? What? 805 01:10:48,692 --> 01:10:52,372 I thought we weren't going to drink anymore. 806 01:10:52,396 --> 01:10:55,608 Well, Dave, yeah, it's true. 807 01:10:55,632 --> 01:10:58,512 I am a vegetarian. 808 01:10:58,536 --> 01:11:02,957 But I hear that vodka comes... 809 01:11:04,377 --> 01:11:06,527 From a potato. 810 01:11:07,713 --> 01:11:12,662 Oh, honey. Oh, I'm so crazy about you. 811 01:11:12,686 --> 01:11:15,198 Let's go upstairs right now... 812 01:11:15,222 --> 01:11:19,137 And make love like we've never made love before. 813 01:11:19,161 --> 01:11:22,681 Oh, darling, I missed you so much. 814 01:11:25,101 --> 01:11:27,551 Oh! Oh! ...A hundred times. 815 01:11:30,407 --> 01:11:32,418 Right now. Barbara... 816 01:11:32,442 --> 01:11:34,692 Ooh, you're the best. Come on. Whoo! 817 01:11:50,629 --> 01:11:52,720 Oh, Jerry! 818 01:11:56,570 --> 01:11:58,920 Oh, I love that, Jerry. 819 01:12:16,460 --> 01:12:18,438 Jerry. Dave. 820 01:12:18,462 --> 01:12:22,422 Yeah. Did you just diddle Carmen? 821 01:12:23,400 --> 01:12:25,379 Yes, Dave, I did. Why? 822 01:12:25,403 --> 01:12:27,381 She asked me to fix her TV. 823 01:12:27,405 --> 01:12:30,384 The male cable holder had come off the cable, 824 01:12:30,408 --> 01:12:35,390 so I reinserted it in the female receptacle. She climbed all over me. 825 01:12:35,414 --> 01:12:39,675 You are such a bastard! Jerry, bring me a tab, please. 826 01:12:46,659 --> 01:12:48,672 Get her the tab. Oh, yeah. 827 01:12:48,696 --> 01:12:53,678 - I don't want you diddling my maid again. - Then take her the tab. 828 01:12:53,702 --> 01:12:56,681 - You take her the tab. - You take it. 829 01:12:56,705 --> 01:12:58,684 Will you grow up? 830 01:12:58,708 --> 01:13:01,520 Go on up. Good. 831 01:13:01,544 --> 01:13:03,522 Okay, hind leg. 832 01:13:03,546 --> 01:13:05,757 All right, ready? Great! 833 01:13:05,781 --> 01:13:08,127 All right, Matisse! 834 01:13:08,151 --> 01:13:10,630 Hey, Dave! Dave! 835 01:13:10,654 --> 01:13:12,666 Matisse just did a half-gainer. 836 01:13:12,690 --> 01:13:16,770 Mexicans are driving me crazy. There's going to be a strike. No. 837 01:13:16,794 --> 01:13:18,772 Now the Chinese are getting cold feet. 838 01:13:18,796 --> 01:13:21,843 That could kill us. Are they coming for new year's? 839 01:13:21,867 --> 01:13:25,114 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Good boy. Good dog. 840 01:13:25,138 --> 01:13:28,150 That was great last night, honey. 841 01:13:28,174 --> 01:13:31,295 Yeah. 842 01:13:32,680 --> 01:13:37,528 The dog is driving me crazy, Jerry. Are you sure it isn't me, Dave? 843 01:13:37,552 --> 01:13:40,364 I'm not sure of anything anymore. Well, I am. 844 01:13:40,388 --> 01:13:43,401 I've worn out my welcome. 845 01:13:43,425 --> 01:13:46,538 I'd just like to see you use your talents. My talent is survival. 846 01:13:46,562 --> 01:13:50,843 I could still make you a manager of one of my trailer parks. 847 01:13:50,867 --> 01:13:55,649 Near the ocean, clean air. What do you say? Hey! 848 01:13:55,673 --> 01:13:58,252 Listen, Dave... here you go, amigo. 849 01:13:58,276 --> 01:14:03,323 Uh, at those trailer parks, people are always complaining. 850 01:14:03,347 --> 01:14:07,695 Their septic tank is backed up; Their trailer's off the blocks and rolling down the hills. 851 01:14:07,719 --> 01:14:12,501 I couldn't deal with that responsibility. I could put you on the line... 852 01:14:12,525 --> 01:14:16,876 At the hanger factory. I think it's time for me to go. 853 01:14:20,734 --> 01:14:22,884 Ah, you can stay. 854 01:14:24,138 --> 01:14:27,860 Through the holidays. You're the boss, Dave. 855 01:14:30,413 --> 01:14:34,559 Hey, Jerry. Ah, Max. Hi. 856 01:14:34,583 --> 01:14:37,563 Hey, uh, thanks. For what? 857 01:14:37,587 --> 01:14:41,301 Well, that was quite a moment for me when you saw me. 858 01:14:41,325 --> 01:14:43,603 You gotta be what you gotta be. 859 01:14:43,627 --> 01:14:46,540 I'm not sure what I'm gonna be. Ah. 860 01:14:46,564 --> 01:14:51,479 Well, you can't hide forever, Max. It's no big deal. 861 01:14:51,503 --> 01:14:55,717 Well, my father... wait a minute. What's your father got to do with this? 862 01:14:55,741 --> 01:14:58,286 Your father is tolerant. 863 01:14:58,310 --> 01:15:01,257 Look at me. Look what he did for me. 864 01:15:01,281 --> 01:15:03,292 I send him tapes. 865 01:15:03,316 --> 01:15:07,131 Besides, if I brought my friends home, and my parents saw them, 866 01:15:07,155 --> 01:15:10,801 they would probably freak out on me. No, wrong, Max. Wrong. 867 01:15:10,825 --> 01:15:15,415 Your parents have been around. I'd try talkin' to 'em. 868 01:15:16,431 --> 01:15:19,277 Talk to them. That's right. 869 01:15:19,301 --> 01:15:21,612 Just go up and say, "hello, mom and dad..." no, real. 870 01:15:21,636 --> 01:15:24,284 Real. Yeah, real. 871 01:15:24,308 --> 01:15:28,458 You mean just go up there and talk to them. That's right. 872 01:15:30,714 --> 01:15:33,461 Okay. Thanks. 873 01:15:33,485 --> 01:15:38,535 Right. I think you can go with more orange too. 874 01:15:39,557 --> 01:15:41,707 Yeah. 875 01:15:57,912 --> 01:16:00,557 Mm. 876 01:16:00,581 --> 01:16:02,062 Mm. 877 01:16:04,186 --> 01:16:08,667 Oh! This is absolutely the last time I'll ask for this, Jerry. I swear. 878 01:16:08,691 --> 01:16:12,241 Yeah. Okay. 879 01:16:15,565 --> 01:16:19,145 Uh, Mr. Whiteman. I got to tell you... 880 01:16:19,169 --> 01:16:22,817 Something is killing the azaleas and begonias in the backyard. 881 01:16:22,841 --> 01:16:25,553 Killed one hydrangea too. 882 01:16:25,577 --> 01:16:28,156 At first I thought it was the dog peeing on them, 883 01:16:28,180 --> 01:16:30,892 but the damage is too big for Matisse. 884 01:16:30,916 --> 01:16:34,263 I don't want you to think it's me and my boy. Richard, Richard, 885 01:16:34,287 --> 01:16:36,365 we both know who it is. 886 01:16:36,389 --> 01:16:40,438 You know, Dave, you look like you could use a vacation. 887 01:16:40,462 --> 01:16:43,574 I got a condo in Hawaii, Napilikai on Maui. 888 01:16:43,598 --> 01:16:46,277 You can use it anytime. 889 01:16:46,301 --> 01:16:50,682 You and your wife, beautiful beach, golf. 890 01:16:50,706 --> 01:16:52,856 You name it. 891 01:16:55,411 --> 01:16:57,561 Thanks. 892 01:17:02,753 --> 01:17:06,567 Sidney, Pearl! You have to concentrate. It's all in the mind. 893 01:17:06,591 --> 01:17:10,737 All right, now. Let's go. Go! Go! 894 01:17:10,761 --> 01:17:13,741 Go! Go, Pearl, go, Pearl. Go, go, go, go! 895 01:17:13,765 --> 01:17:15,955 Go, go, go, go! 896 01:17:17,337 --> 01:17:19,715 All right! You did it! You did it! You did it! 897 01:17:19,739 --> 01:17:22,485 All right, Barbara. Barbara, over there. 898 01:17:22,509 --> 01:17:26,590 All right, now, come on, Barbara. 899 01:17:26,614 --> 01:17:28,625 I'm gonna wet my pants. Barbara, it's in your mind. 900 01:17:28,649 --> 01:17:30,627 Now come on. Okay. 901 01:17:30,651 --> 01:17:33,897 Go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go. 902 01:17:33,921 --> 01:17:37,573 Go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go! 903 01:17:40,262 --> 01:17:43,409 Get Dave. Dave! Oh, Dave! 904 01:17:43,433 --> 01:17:45,412 Dave! Dave! 905 01:17:45,436 --> 01:17:48,515 What is this? What did you do? 906 01:17:48,539 --> 01:17:51,284 I don't have to do that. Barbara, please... 907 01:17:51,308 --> 01:17:53,586 someone is pissing on my hydrangeas! 908 01:17:53,610 --> 01:17:56,602 Go, Matisse! 909 01:18:00,619 --> 01:18:04,165 Go, go, go, go! 910 01:18:04,189 --> 01:18:06,768 Go, go, go, go! 911 01:18:06,792 --> 01:18:09,372 Jerry's urged me to try and communicate with you, 912 01:18:09,396 --> 01:18:12,675 but too often in our relationship, you have shown only anger. 913 01:18:12,699 --> 01:18:15,546 Jerry says anger will get you nowhere. 914 01:18:15,570 --> 01:18:17,681 Here are some samples of your anger. 915 01:18:17,705 --> 01:18:21,218 - Get out of here, Max. - Get out of here, Max! 916 01:18:21,242 --> 01:18:24,121 It's hangers that clothe and feed you! 917 01:18:24,145 --> 01:18:26,491 - You're giving me a headache. - Get out of here, Max! 918 01:18:26,515 --> 01:18:29,895 - Max! - Max! Get away! Get away! 919 01:18:29,919 --> 01:18:32,197 I'm on the phone! I'm on the phone! 920 01:18:32,221 --> 01:18:34,742 P.S. I love you. 921 01:18:37,160 --> 01:18:40,173 I don't understand. Why doesn't he show us the nice scenes? 922 01:18:40,197 --> 01:18:44,579 I think he's trying to reach out to us, to say something to us. 923 01:18:44,603 --> 01:18:47,582 Why doesn't he talk to Dr. Toni Grant? 924 01:18:47,606 --> 01:18:51,587 Oy, life! Oh, boy! He likes Jerry more than he likes me. 925 01:18:51,611 --> 01:18:53,656 Oh, nonsense. True. It's true. 926 01:18:53,680 --> 01:18:56,740 Oh, honey, relax, relax! 927 01:19:00,353 --> 01:19:03,401 You feeling sexy tonight? 928 01:19:03,425 --> 01:19:07,571 No. Oh. It might calm you down. 929 01:19:07,595 --> 01:19:11,576 I have to figure out what to do about Jerry. Not tonight. 930 01:19:11,600 --> 01:19:14,421 Tonight I'm going to give you an aura massage. 931 01:19:16,540 --> 01:19:19,752 He's pissing in the garden. He's ruining all the flowers. 932 01:19:19,776 --> 01:19:22,555 He's cleaning out all the refrigerators. 933 01:19:22,579 --> 01:19:26,593 Well, he has helped my headaches. 934 01:19:26,617 --> 01:19:30,865 I offered him a job the other day. He said it was too much trouble. 935 01:19:30,889 --> 01:19:34,301 Too much trouble. That's it. Ow, ow, ow! 936 01:19:34,325 --> 01:19:38,541 I gotta get him out of here. At least wait until after the party. 937 01:19:38,565 --> 01:19:41,610 Why are you defending him all of a sudden? Honey! 938 01:19:41,634 --> 01:19:44,713 You've done a wonderful thing for this man, 939 01:19:44,737 --> 01:19:48,585 and in the process, you have taught me a very important lesson. 940 01:19:48,609 --> 01:19:52,222 I think he's diddling Carmen. That bastard has to go. 941 01:19:52,246 --> 01:19:55,593 Barbara, Barbara, the transplants. Barbara, Barbara! 942 01:19:55,617 --> 01:19:57,929 Oh! Oh, honey, I'm sorry. 943 01:19:57,953 --> 01:20:00,766 I got such a migraine. 944 01:20:00,790 --> 01:20:03,735 I thought your boyfriend was coming home with you. 945 01:20:03,759 --> 01:20:08,174 What a wimp he turned out to be, dad. A total drug addict. 946 01:20:08,198 --> 01:20:11,745 This is the Jim guy. Yes. 947 01:20:11,769 --> 01:20:15,148 Tell me about this Jerry. Mother says he's very gifted. 948 01:20:15,172 --> 01:20:17,851 Ah, he's okay. 949 01:20:17,875 --> 01:20:20,922 So you want to stop at the deli? No. 950 01:20:20,946 --> 01:20:25,760 You used to love that. I used to walk you there... I was nine years old. 951 01:20:25,784 --> 01:20:28,931 Okay, okay. Jerry r. Baskin, this is my daughter, Jen. 952 01:20:28,955 --> 01:20:31,835 So you're the one that doesn't eat. 953 01:20:31,859 --> 01:20:34,705 You're a legend in your own time, Mr. Baskin. 954 01:20:34,729 --> 01:20:38,374 No, no, no, no. I'm just a bum. 955 01:20:38,398 --> 01:20:43,389 You look more like a millionaire to me. You should see the way he eats. 956 01:20:44,673 --> 01:20:48,621 Could we have some music, dad? No, they stole my Blaupunkt. 957 01:20:48,645 --> 01:20:51,724 I apologized about that radio. I loaned him the car, 958 01:20:51,748 --> 01:20:53,727 and my radio was stolen. It wasn't my fault. 959 01:20:53,751 --> 01:20:56,329 Then whose fault is it? I'd like to know! 960 01:20:56,353 --> 01:20:58,798 I think I'll transfer to Vassar, mom. 961 01:20:58,822 --> 01:21:00,734 They have this great exchange program. 962 01:21:00,758 --> 01:21:02,902 I can go to Italy in my junior year. 963 01:21:02,926 --> 01:21:04,873 I think Europe would be great for you. 964 01:21:04,897 --> 01:21:08,887 So, um, what's with this Jerry guy? Oh, he's okay. 965 01:21:10,235 --> 01:21:12,914 Something about him I don't trust. Well, honey, he... 966 01:21:12,938 --> 01:21:15,829 he has a strange wisdom. 967 01:21:17,443 --> 01:21:21,858 Mom, is it all right if I invite a couple of friends to our party? 968 01:21:21,882 --> 01:21:25,897 Sure, honey. We could play some music. I'm forming a band. 969 01:21:25,921 --> 01:21:27,899 You know any Chinese songs? 970 01:21:27,923 --> 01:21:29,901 How many of the Chinese are coming? 971 01:21:29,925 --> 01:21:34,739 Ten. They travel in gangs. Oh. Well, what are we eating? 972 01:21:34,763 --> 01:21:38,377 Kosher, Chinese, and Mexican. I invited Orvis and his wife. 973 01:21:38,401 --> 01:21:40,613 That's okay, isn't it? That's great, honey. 974 01:21:40,637 --> 01:21:42,616 You must have had a lot to eat on the plane. 975 01:21:42,640 --> 01:21:44,685 I don't remember talking to you. 976 01:21:44,709 --> 01:21:47,588 Looks like you're starving. Keep your brilliant insights to yourself. 977 01:21:47,612 --> 01:21:50,925 We don't talk about it, Jerry. Oh, I see. 978 01:21:50,949 --> 01:21:54,596 It's better to get things out in the open. Right. 979 01:21:54,620 --> 01:21:58,399 Shut up, Max. You know, you are a troublemaker, mister. 980 01:21:58,423 --> 01:22:01,871 Why don't you just stay out of family business, okay? 981 01:22:01,895 --> 01:22:06,442 I'm sick and tired of you too, Jer. I apologized about the radio. 982 01:22:06,466 --> 01:22:10,581 For Christ's sake, look at your daughter. It's not about the radio! 983 01:22:10,605 --> 01:22:13,217 I'm out of here. No! No! no! 984 01:22:13,241 --> 01:22:16,587 - Dave, this can wait. - Okay, okay, okay. 985 01:22:16,611 --> 01:22:20,762 - We'll talk about it after the party. - You're the boss, Dave. 986 01:22:22,819 --> 01:22:24,969 Give me a piece of cake. 987 01:22:28,859 --> 01:22:31,009 Thank you. 988 01:22:38,435 --> 01:22:41,616 There you are, Matisse. Yes. 989 01:22:50,950 --> 01:22:54,164 Carmen, I can't go on like this. 990 01:22:54,188 --> 01:22:55,966 Get out. No, this is killing me. 991 01:22:55,990 --> 01:22:58,202 You betrayed me. She's my wife. 992 01:22:58,226 --> 01:23:01,205 I knew you would say that. What's the matter? 993 01:23:01,229 --> 01:23:05,811 Don't you like me? That's not the point. But now I see the big picture. 994 01:23:05,835 --> 01:23:08,313 What big picture? You are the imperialist. 995 01:23:08,337 --> 01:23:11,449 You see me like the third world. What? 996 01:23:11,473 --> 01:23:15,187 Oh, struggle is a great teacher. You see, I am nothing. 997 01:23:15,211 --> 01:23:17,658 I am the worker; You are the capitalist. 998 01:23:17,682 --> 01:23:21,628 The only way we change this is revolution. W-wait, no, no. 999 01:23:21,652 --> 01:23:25,165 We were having fun. Yes, decadent fun. 1000 01:23:25,189 --> 01:23:28,203 Where are you getting all this crap on the walls? 1001 01:23:28,227 --> 01:23:31,807 Did you join a communist discussion group? My father was a communist. 1002 01:23:31,831 --> 01:23:34,710 You're a traitor to your class. Where are you getting this stuff? 1003 01:23:34,734 --> 01:23:36,746 Books. Books? What books? 1004 01:23:36,770 --> 01:23:39,683 The books that Jerry gave to me. 1005 01:23:39,707 --> 01:23:41,857 Jerry. 1006 01:23:43,845 --> 01:23:45,955 Jerry. 1007 01:23:49,918 --> 01:23:52,068 Jerry. 1008 01:23:53,621 --> 01:23:56,272 Jerry, Jerry, Jerry, Jerry, Jerry. 1009 01:23:58,627 --> 01:24:01,348 Jerry. Yeah, Jerry. 1010 01:24:57,495 --> 01:24:59,645 Debussy? 1011 01:25:00,665 --> 01:25:02,775 Yeah. 1012 01:25:03,936 --> 01:25:06,086 You play very well. 1013 01:25:07,540 --> 01:25:10,987 I play fair. It's hard to find pianos in alleys, you know. 1014 01:25:11,011 --> 01:25:14,490 Just another one of your hidden talents, huh? 1015 01:25:14,514 --> 01:25:17,461 Yeah. 1016 01:25:17,485 --> 01:25:20,605 When I played the concert circuit, I always opened with Debussy. 1017 01:25:22,190 --> 01:25:25,536 I want you to know that I'm on to you, Jerry. 1018 01:25:25,560 --> 01:25:27,872 You're very attractive in a sick way. 1019 01:25:27,896 --> 01:25:30,376 You're charming, iconoclastic. You're a sociopath. 1020 01:25:30,400 --> 01:25:34,313 I'm a psych major, so I know all about people like you. 1021 01:25:34,337 --> 01:25:36,950 My parents, on the other hand, 1022 01:25:36,974 --> 01:25:40,554 they are kind, compassionate, totally naive people, 1023 01:25:40,578 --> 01:25:45,225 and you are taking advantage of their kindness and their naivete. 1024 01:25:45,249 --> 01:25:48,796 That's disgusting, it's immoral, and I won't tolerate it, okay? 1025 01:25:48,820 --> 01:25:51,581 Do you understand me, Jerry? 1026 01:25:52,859 --> 01:25:55,671 You can find a way to leave quietly and gracefully, 1027 01:25:55,695 --> 01:25:58,740 or I'm gonna have to find another way to deal with you. 1028 01:25:58,764 --> 01:26:02,485 The game is over, Jerry, as of tonight. 1029 01:26:31,536 --> 01:26:33,680 Hi. Barbara, it's beautiful. 1030 01:26:33,704 --> 01:26:36,684 Great touch, Barbara. Wait 'til you hear the fireworks. 1031 01:26:36,708 --> 01:26:40,588 Barbara, it's Mr. Chan. Darling, relax. That's the caterer. 1032 01:26:40,612 --> 01:26:44,292 I hope he brought enough abalone delight. Oh, oh, look who's here. 1033 01:26:44,316 --> 01:26:47,431 Orvis! Hey, hey! Thank you so much for coming! 1034 01:26:47,455 --> 01:26:49,699 Nice to see you. My wife, Sondra. 1035 01:26:49,723 --> 01:26:53,770 Sondra, pleasure. This is my wife, Barbara. Dr. and Mrs. Waltzberg. 1036 01:26:53,794 --> 01:26:56,975 Hello. How are you? Would like something to eat? 1037 01:26:56,999 --> 01:27:00,245 Please, come with me. We'll get you a little bite. 1038 01:27:00,269 --> 01:27:03,448 Introduce you to some of our friends. How are you? 1039 01:27:03,472 --> 01:27:06,252 Sidney Waxman and his wife, Pearl. Pleasure to meet you. 1040 01:27:06,276 --> 01:27:10,590 These are my in-laws. Sadie and Mel Whiteman. 1041 01:27:10,614 --> 01:27:14,261 This is my decorator, Geraldo. Hello. 1042 01:27:14,285 --> 01:27:16,796 Mucho gusto. My yoga instructor, Baba Ranbir. 1043 01:27:16,820 --> 01:27:19,433 Nice meeting you. My dog psychiatrist, 1044 01:27:19,457 --> 01:27:21,335 pleasure to meet you. Dr. Von Zimmer. 1045 01:27:21,359 --> 01:27:23,472 Oh, nice meeting you, doctor. 1046 01:27:23,496 --> 01:27:26,241 Is that his wife? She's a white girl. 1047 01:27:26,265 --> 01:27:30,426 They don't have any white meat. Not white meat, white wife. 1048 01:27:37,811 --> 01:27:42,327 Dave, the Chinese. Oh, oh, oh, oh! Excuse me. 1049 01:27:42,351 --> 01:27:45,363 I'm terribly sorry. I should have been here to greet you. 1050 01:27:45,387 --> 01:27:49,467 I'm Dave Whiteman. I'm your host. Welcome to my home, minister Chan. 1051 01:27:49,491 --> 01:27:51,971 So good to see you. Minister dong, 1052 01:27:51,995 --> 01:27:55,674 and all the other ministers, and, and, and managers. 1053 01:27:55,698 --> 01:27:58,677 Minister Chan said, 1054 01:27:58,701 --> 01:28:01,548 "is it all right if we hang around?" 1055 01:28:01,572 --> 01:28:04,723 Business joke. Get it? Hangers. Hangers. 1056 01:28:06,378 --> 01:28:08,498 Charming. 1057 01:28:12,251 --> 01:28:15,464 That's very funny. This is my wife, Barbara. How do you do? 1058 01:28:15,488 --> 01:28:19,501 Most beautiful flower in the garden. 1059 01:28:19,525 --> 01:28:21,671 Thank you very much. Thank you very much. 1060 01:28:21,695 --> 01:28:24,845 Would the minister care for some Shanghai plum wine? 1061 01:28:26,568 --> 01:28:28,912 Tab, with a slice of lemon, please. 1062 01:28:28,936 --> 01:28:31,056 Tab. Tab. 1063 01:28:33,841 --> 01:28:37,656 They all want tab. I don't have that much tab. Many tabs. 1064 01:28:37,680 --> 01:28:40,260 That's very... oh, here is my daughter, Jenny. 1065 01:28:40,284 --> 01:28:42,874 Pleased to meet you, minister Chan. 1066 01:28:55,233 --> 01:28:59,248 Ho, ho, ho, ho! Happy new year. 1067 01:28:59,272 --> 01:29:02,518 Here you are. Thank you, Santa. Jerry! 1068 01:29:02,542 --> 01:29:06,689 Ho, ho, ho, ho! Please tell minister Chan that this man... 1069 01:29:06,713 --> 01:29:09,793 Was eating garbage just three short weeks ago. 1070 01:29:09,817 --> 01:29:12,796 Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho. Oh, tabs! 1071 01:29:12,820 --> 01:29:16,433 Tabs all around. Minister. Yes. 1072 01:29:16,457 --> 01:29:18,536 Thank you. Oh, you're so welcome. 1073 01:29:18,560 --> 01:29:22,441 Happy new year. Are you having a happy new year, spider? 1074 01:29:22,465 --> 01:29:26,912 We've made a good start, have we not? Things are so much better. 1075 01:29:26,936 --> 01:29:28,980 And next year will even be better. 1076 01:29:29,004 --> 01:29:33,586 Okay, everybody, Orvis goodnight is going to play for us, 1077 01:29:33,610 --> 01:29:37,801 and there's going to be dancing in the living room, so come on, let's go. 1078 01:29:39,751 --> 01:29:42,402 Oh. 1079 01:30:11,820 --> 01:30:14,667 More power to the people. Viva la revolucion. 1080 01:30:14,691 --> 01:30:18,505 I'm a Marxist. 1081 01:30:18,529 --> 01:30:21,808 Radical leftist nonsense. 1082 01:30:21,832 --> 01:30:25,679 Don't argue in front of people. You want to lose weight? 1083 01:30:25,703 --> 01:30:29,824 Blow it out your ass. I don't want to talk about weight. 1084 01:30:37,851 --> 01:30:40,001 Having a good time? 1085 01:30:41,555 --> 01:30:46,135 Hi, dad. I would like to introduce you to some of my friends. 1086 01:30:47,428 --> 01:30:51,008 This is Jill, and this is Alexis, 1087 01:30:51,032 --> 01:30:53,678 and there's Moses, and that's Jordan, 1088 01:30:53,702 --> 01:30:56,915 and that's crystal. This is my band. 1089 01:30:56,939 --> 01:30:58,883 Dad, I know that you're shocked, 1090 01:30:58,907 --> 01:31:02,522 but don't say anything until you've thought about it. 1091 01:31:02,546 --> 01:31:06,659 Until Jerry encouraged me to face the truth, I was in torment. 1092 01:31:06,683 --> 01:31:11,575 And I realize now I just have to be myself. I know that you understand. 1093 01:31:13,259 --> 01:31:15,903 'Cause I love you, dad. 1094 01:31:15,927 --> 01:31:18,706 I got lipstick on you. 1095 01:31:18,730 --> 01:31:20,910 Okay, we're gonna set up. 1096 01:31:28,775 --> 01:31:32,923 Daddy? Don't worry about Max, okay? 1097 01:31:32,947 --> 01:31:37,027 This androgynous thing that he's doing is all part of growing up. 1098 01:31:37,051 --> 01:31:40,698 Really. Teen-agers are under a lot of sexual pressure, 1099 01:31:40,722 --> 01:31:43,301 and this relieves it, I promise you. Jenny. 1100 01:31:43,325 --> 01:31:45,804 What? Jenny. 1101 01:31:45,828 --> 01:31:49,409 Did I just see you eat something? I was starving. 1102 01:31:49,433 --> 01:31:53,053 You're kidding! That's fabulous! What happened? 1103 01:31:55,573 --> 01:31:57,585 Daddy, I'm in love. 1104 01:31:57,609 --> 01:32:00,954 I am madly, passionately in love. You're kidding. 1105 01:32:00,978 --> 01:32:04,458 No. This is great news. Who is it? 1106 01:32:04,482 --> 01:32:06,828 Nobody was ever good enough before, 1107 01:32:06,852 --> 01:32:10,800 because I kept comparing everybody to you. Oh, don't be silly. 1108 01:32:10,824 --> 01:32:14,937 Really. I was such a bitch. I mean, a total Princess. 1109 01:32:14,961 --> 01:32:19,743 Once I let go of my illusions and my stupid preconceptions... come on, come on. 1110 01:32:19,767 --> 01:32:22,012 Who is it? Who is it? 1111 01:32:22,036 --> 01:32:24,348 Tell me who it is. Jerry. 1112 01:32:24,372 --> 01:32:27,452 Jerry. Jerry who? Our Jerry, dad. 1113 01:32:27,476 --> 01:32:30,497 It's a miracle. 1114 01:32:33,015 --> 01:32:36,862 Did you and he, uh... it was really a miracle. 1115 01:32:36,886 --> 01:32:38,865 Excuse me, one second. 1116 01:32:38,889 --> 01:32:42,536 You son of a... 1117 01:32:42,560 --> 01:32:45,981 you took my baby! You took my baby! 1118 01:32:53,038 --> 01:32:56,352 I'm gonna kill him! He took my baby! 1119 01:32:56,376 --> 01:32:58,496 Dave! Dave! He took my baby! 1120 01:33:17,433 --> 01:33:20,412 I'll kill you, you son of a bitch! 1121 01:33:20,436 --> 01:33:22,686 Call 911! 1122 01:33:28,579 --> 01:33:30,699 Dave! Dave! 1123 01:33:41,026 --> 01:33:44,540 Explain to the minister that in Beverly Hills on new year's... 1124 01:33:44,564 --> 01:33:49,015 It's the custom for people to jump in to show they're happy. 1125 01:34:00,582 --> 01:34:04,029 - Dave! - Oh, David, help! - Call 911! 1126 01:34:04,053 --> 01:34:08,074 Call 911! 1127 01:34:10,427 --> 01:34:15,408 Call 911! Call 911! 1128 01:34:15,432 --> 01:34:19,753 Oh, trouble at the O.K. Corral. 1129 01:34:25,410 --> 01:34:29,031 I'll kill ya! I'll, I'll kill ya! 1130 01:34:34,020 --> 01:34:36,432 Can't you make them stop? What happened? 1131 01:34:36,456 --> 01:34:38,576 Get that cigar away from me. 1132 01:35:06,525 --> 01:35:09,805 What a fucking party. 1133 01:35:49,006 --> 01:35:53,026 You bit my neck. Wise guy. 1134 01:35:53,911 --> 01:35:57,733 You tried to kill me. I was provoked. 1135 01:35:59,752 --> 01:36:02,732 You shouldn't have saved me in the first place. 1136 01:36:04,023 --> 01:36:07,502 I lent you a hand, and you bit it. 1137 01:36:07,526 --> 01:36:10,707 I gave folks what they wanted. Really? 1138 01:36:10,731 --> 01:36:12,911 Yeah. Linda Evans? 1139 01:36:14,869 --> 01:36:17,414 I never met the lady. Hm. 1140 01:36:17,438 --> 01:36:21,529 The sister with leukemia? I never had a sister. 1141 01:36:22,778 --> 01:36:26,758 The ashram? I drove by it once. 1142 01:36:26,782 --> 01:36:29,561 The books? The political books? 1143 01:36:29,585 --> 01:36:32,031 Picked 'em up in a supermarket. 1144 01:36:32,055 --> 01:36:36,904 - What about us? - Aw, Jenny, 1145 01:36:36,928 --> 01:36:39,578 c'est la vie. 1146 01:36:41,499 --> 01:36:43,978 You took advantage, Jer. You lied. 1147 01:36:44,002 --> 01:36:45,980 What did you want to hear, Dave? 1148 01:36:46,004 --> 01:36:50,619 Real heartbreak? Real sorrow? It's boring. 1149 01:36:50,643 --> 01:36:52,795 Here's your pants. 1150 01:36:55,783 --> 01:36:59,062 That's my underwear too, buddy. All right. Yeah, all right. 1151 01:36:59,086 --> 01:37:01,176 That's right. 1152 01:37:03,625 --> 01:37:06,804 Here's the money the Iranian guy gave me for his kid... 1153 01:37:06,828 --> 01:37:08,806 When I gave him an apple. 1154 01:37:08,830 --> 01:37:11,910 Keep it. You gave him the apple. 1155 01:37:11,934 --> 01:37:14,755 It was your apple. Here's your clothes. 1156 01:37:15,706 --> 01:37:17,917 And you can keep your hanger factories, 1157 01:37:17,941 --> 01:37:21,587 and you can keep your credit cards and everything else. 1158 01:37:21,611 --> 01:37:24,991 It's called commitment, amigo. I don't need it. 1159 01:37:25,015 --> 01:37:29,497 Yeah, I know, I know. You're free. You're free to eat garbage. 1160 01:37:29,521 --> 01:37:32,768 Yep, and I can piss anywhere I want to. 1161 01:37:32,792 --> 01:37:35,771 You could have pissed right here, Jerry. Dave, he did. 1162 01:37:35,795 --> 01:37:39,008 He pissed all over the joint. 1163 01:37:39,032 --> 01:37:42,552 Where you going? I'm real curious. Who knows? 1164 01:37:44,337 --> 01:37:47,550 Stay. I'll make you a nice cappuccino. 1165 01:37:47,574 --> 01:37:49,520 Now go on back, Matisse. 1166 01:37:49,544 --> 01:37:54,174 No, Jerry, you take him. You're the only one he listens to anyway. 1167 01:37:56,852 --> 01:38:01,213 - Departure scene, take one. - I'll never eat again. 1168 01:38:10,936 --> 01:38:13,086 Come on, Matisse. 1169 01:38:16,607 --> 01:38:20,756 It's our lucky day, amigo. There's lots of places we can go: 1170 01:38:20,780 --> 01:38:23,025 'Frisco, Santa Fe, Ensenada. 1171 01:38:23,049 --> 01:38:27,931 Jerry's gonna show you the ropes. I'll show you the best parks to sleep in, 1172 01:38:27,955 --> 01:38:31,936 beaches where the coconuts flop into the palms of your hands. 1173 01:38:31,960 --> 01:38:34,438 We'll make our own schedule. 1174 01:38:34,462 --> 01:38:38,882 We don't owe nothin' to nobody. All right, yeah. 1175 01:38:40,301 --> 01:38:43,548 What's wrong, amigo? You hungry? 1176 01:38:43,572 --> 01:38:46,618 Come on, Jerry'll fix us up some good grub. 1177 01:38:46,642 --> 01:38:49,932 Here. There ought to be good garbage in here. 1178 01:38:50,781 --> 01:38:53,601 Ah, look at this. Pate. 1179 01:38:55,486 --> 01:38:59,933 Oh, this is gonna be good. Only the best gourmet chow in town for us. 1180 01:38:59,957 --> 01:39:03,636 Here, take a bite. What's the matter? 1181 01:39:03,660 --> 01:39:07,109 This is good stuff. This is the best garbage in town. 1182 01:39:07,133 --> 01:39:09,453 This is primo. 1183 01:39:42,673 --> 01:39:45,493 Let's go grab a cup of cappuccino.